Alot of children today are not developing a love of reading that will help them be successful adults. As parents, our fundamental duty is to prepare our children for adulthood. We give them our love and our time, and by doing this we are preparing them to face the world. Teaching them to read and to love reading will also help prepare them to face the world with confidence and to be successful. Let us not forget what our job is as we continue to help our children grow into healthy and happy adults.

One of my favorite pictures of me was taken when I was about 11/2 years old. I was sitting in a little red rocking chair made by my grandfather reading a book to a big orange a white cat who was sitting in my lap. I am 28 years old now and two of my greatest loves are reading and cats. Ok, maybe my love for cats has not made me successful, but I know that my love for reading has helped me become the person I am today. I am so grateful to my parents for instilling in me a love for reading and education. I don’t remember sitting in that little red chair reading that book, but I do have very fond memories of my mom and dad reading to me, helping me learn to read, and later on helping me with my homework. Because of that healthy respect I have for education, I was able to succeed in college and graduate school. I have a 11/2 year old son now, and I know how important it is to teach him to have a love for reading. I hope that all parents will realize this and will get their children involved in reading at an early age.

About The Author
Paula Wilson is the mother of a 1 year old son. She has developed the WAHM website http://www.wahmresourceplace.com. She is an Independent Consultant for Usborne Books, and her website can be found here: http://www.ubah.com/x1367

There are many ways to commemorate your son or daughter’s birthday. Something interesting might be taking pictures throughout the whole day and creating a photo book or an online journal.  This tradition would prove to be priceless, years down the road.  It would be so extraordinary to have a stack of albums that depict the changes that each year brings. Not only for you to look back on–in remembrance–but for your child(ren) to look back on and share with [his or her] future children.

So when your child’s special day rolls around, pull out your trusty camera, and have fun shooting the day.  Capture the regular aspects life: capture smiles, little tantrums, meals, twinkly eyes, naps, bath-time, play-time, everything. Life is full of these amazing moments for us to highlight and remember!

Some Photo Journaling Tips:

• Plan what you want to photo journal (birthday, party, family outing, etc..)
• Pick a topic that showcases your special day
• Print photos or have photo books made
• Add captions to your photo journal for an extra touch, and
• Have fun documenting your family memories

When you find out you are pregnant and tell your children that they are going to have a new brother or sister, the reactions can be mixed. Based on your child’s age and activities, they might either be very excited or upset by this new addition. Some kids can’t wait till their baby brother or sister arrives, while others worry about what it will mean to them. Will they lose a part of you? Will you have less time and attention to give to them? Will you let them help with the baby?

If you work outside of the house, when you get home at the end of the day, especially during the first trimester, you probably find that you are exhausted and just want to lay down. Your children though, no matter what the age, will want to spend time with you, or need help with homework, and you won’t be able to relax and prop up your feet. After all, a mother’s job is never done.

If you are a stay-at-home-mom with little kids who are home with you all day, then life will get really hectic. During the first trimester when you are really tired and just want to sleep, you can’t necessarily lay down on demand, rather you have to prepare meals, run errands, play with the kids, and listen to their unending questions. “Mommy, is the baby coming today? Mommy, how much longer? Mommy, is the baby kicking? Mommy, can I feel?”

During the second trimester you might be feeling better, more energetic, and more up to having fun with your children. Then comes the third trimester and the innocent childlike comments that you may hear, that make you want to laugh and cry at the same time. My favorite was, “Mom, you used to be skinny and now you are fat. I like you better skinny but sometimes being fat is ok because it means you have a baby in your belly.” Uh, thanks dear…I love you too!

Involving your children in the doctor’s appointments can help make the trips with little ones easier to handle. Ask your doctor or midwife if your child can help find the heartbeat or help measure your belly. Look into sibling classes at your hospital, that you can take your children too. They will get a chance to see other baby’s, and see where you will be when you have the new addition. Take them to your ultrasounds so that they can see their new brother or sister moving around inside your belly.

If you are a stay-at-home-mom to school age children you should consider yourself lucky! You get 7-8 hours during the day to yourself. You get to relax, run errands without tag-a-longs which makes everything more exhausting, and take a nap when you feel you need it. Older kids tend to understand a little more about mommy being tired, and will at least attempt to help you out around the house…if you are lucky.

Being pregnant with children already is a totally new experience that is rewarding and stressful at the same time. No matter what trimester you are in or what stage of pregnancy, being pregnant after having a child will be totally different than the first time you were pregnant.

There are few thoughts as terrifying as the abduction of your young child by a stranger. The fear causes parents to think long and hard about their children’s safety. They tell them in a very clear voice, “Do not to talk to strangers.”

The problem is though, that a child’s view of a stranger is very different from a parent’s view. From the child’s perspective, because a stranger is someone they are supposed to be afraid of, they expect a stranger to look ugly or scary. In fact, few, if any strangers actually look like the child’s notion. Then to make matters more confusing for children, we teach then to respect and listen to their elders and be polite. Then as role models, children see us talk to people we have never met before, day in and day out.

So young children get it and will not to talk to strangers. They will very willingly avoid scary looking people. However, when confronted by a friendly, kind looking older person, they will likely respond politely, which in most cases means “speaking when spoken to” and as they are taught in school, they will follow their directions.

Helping young children not to talk to strangers or not go with them, takes much more than the simple admonishment, “Don’t talk to strangers.”

Parents who want to increase the likelihood that their child will avoid or leave from persons unknown must spend a good amount of time talking about the issue and teaching their children on an ongoing basis. These tips may help:

When out in the community, in a matter of fact voice, point out the various people and ask your child if s/he knows them. Use this as an opportunity to explain that a stranger is any person we do not know, regardless of what they look like.

Next it becomes very important to differentiate the rules for grown-ups and the rules for children. Sometimes simply phasing it as, “Are you old enough to talk to people you don’t know by yourself?” and then explain that they must have your permission to do so.

In the event a stranger approaches a child, they then must be equipped with strategies to manage the situation. Some parents provide a “code word.” Explain to the child if someone doesn’t know the code word, they do not have permission to go or talk with the person. In such situations, the child must be instructed to leave the person and immediately go to another adult they know, or older child if an adult is not available. It important to also teach the child that this is not rude. The child must understand that they have your full permission to leave the situation and to do so immediately. Managing your child’s safety, in your absence is truly a scary thought for most parents. We do not want to put undue fear in our children, but we do want to keep them from harm. It is important to understand how our own behaviour may contradict what we want children to do when approached by people they do not know. We have to talk about the difference between what parents may do and what children may do. Only parents may touch the stove… only parents talk to strangers.

Finally, in addition to teaching who NOT to talk to, we must also teach, who they CAN talk to. If for instance, your child is lost in the store, who can they talk to? Develop a list of safe persons your child can talk to – even if they do not know them. The list may include police, fireman, teachers and even cashiers in stores. Remember keeping children safe is an ongoing discussion and not a simple one-time set of rules.

Keep talking with them to keep them safe.

Gary Direnfeld, MSW
garydi@sympatico.ca
905 628-4847

About The Author
Gary Direnfeld is a social worker and expert on matters of family life. He is in private practice, writes and provides workshops and is the developer of the “I Promise Program” – teen safe driving initiative. Search his name on GOOGLE.COM to view his many articles. Feel free to call him for your next conference and for expert opinion on family matters. Courts in Ontario consider Gary an expert on child development, marital and family therapy, custody and access recommendations and social work. garydi@sympatico.ca.

Be especially careful about keeping children safe in and around cars during busy times, schedule changes, periods of crisis, or holidays. There are an alarming number of children who have been injured or killed after being left alone in or around vehicles. According to Janette Fennell, founder of KIDS AND CARS, at least 213 children died as a result of non-traffic incidents in 2005, the largest number of deaths in a single year. “Backover” incidents injure or kill over 2,500 children each year with over 70% of these incidents involving an immediate family member. Another disturbing trend we see emerging is that children are being killed as vehicles slowly move forward in driveways and parking lots.

Some real-life scenarios where children were injured or killed, include:

• Children let themselves into an unlocked parked car and lock themselves in or put the car in gear;
• The caretaker unknowingly leaves the child behind (e.g., parent forgets to bring the child to child care and the child is left in the car while the parent works or the child is left in the vehicle after a field trip) and dies of heat stroke;
• The child is intentionally left alone in the car while the caretaker engages in another activity (e.g., runs an errand, drops a child off at school) and is abducted, strangled by a power window or sets the vehicle in motion; or
• The child is behind the car when the car is backing out of the driveway and, because they cannot be seen, the child is run over.

To avoid this from happening you can:

• Tell parents about the dangers of leaving children alone in or around vehicles.
• Post a KIDS AND CARS poster ( HYPERLINK www.KidsAndCars.org)
• Keep car keys out of reach of children and keep vehicles locked, even in the driveway and garage.
• Ask your child care provider to call you if your child, who is expected at child care is not dropped off within 1-2 hours of the expected arrival time. Be sure to let the child care provider know if your child will not be attending child care as normally scheduled.
• Ensure that children are not left unattended in vehicles.
• Be sure all children are accounted for before moving a vehicle or exiting a vehicle.

For more information about this issue contact KIDS AND CARS at www.KidsAndCars.org.

Safely on the Move (866)700-7686 www.safelyonthemove.sdsu.edu.

Sources:

1. CBS News, The Early Show, Consumer Watch New York, July 1st, 2005, “Never Leave Kids Alone in the Car” www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/07/21/earlyshow/living/ConsumerWatch/main710550.shtml

    

2. C. McLaren, J. Null, and J. Quinn Heat Stress from enclosed vehicles: Moderate Ambient Temperatures Cause Significant Temperature Rise in Enclosed Vehicles. Pediatrics 2005;116;109-112 DOI: 10.1542/peds.2004-2368 ggweather.com/heat/index.htm

    

3. Statistics, KidsAndCars.org

   About The Article
   This information provided by San Diego State University Foundation.

Nurture and Teach
The single most important thing caregivers can do for a child is provide a nurturing environment. By doing this, we influence children’s brain development and their ability to learn. Introducing nurtured children to learning opportunities every day will help them become happy, well-adjusted adults. In all stages of child development, each experience builds on the one before it. The most basic foundations can serve as the basis for the comprehension of more complex ideas in future years.

Learning Begins at Birth
We are born with billions of brain cells – in fact, all we will ever have. What is missing is a large amount of connections – synapses – between those brain cells. Synapses start developing based on a child’s experiences. Children’s brains develop faster from birth to age three than any other time; and more learning takes place during this time than any other. The more learning opportunities parents provide for their children from birth until school age, the more synapses are made. The connections will serve as a pool of knowledge for a child to access in later years.

Because children’s earliest experiences affect how they will think, learn and behave, helping children learn from birth to school age is a crucial activity. Parents and other caregivers can create a strong foundation for learning by providing a nurturing and rich learning environment from the very beginning.

Children Seek Learning Experiences
Not only do children need to be physically active, it is their nature to look for opportunities to learn. They participate in learning by using their senses and asking countless questions in order to more fully understand the task at hand.

Creating a Learning Environment
Children enjoy learning when they can master an activity. Begin with a simple task and expand or complicate it after your child has enjoyed some successes.

Create a safe and secure learning environment. This will help children do their best learning rather than distract them. Key to creating this environment is treating your child with respect and caring.

Where Do Children Learn?
Children learn everywhere from school to the doctor’s office to the grocery store. As do adults, children learn from interacting with others and watching their parents’ behavior. Kids are highly influenced by the people in their lives, especially adults who they are close to.

Not All Children Learn in the Same Way
In the book Frame of Mind, Howard Gardner described his theory of multiple intelligences. We all have a certain way we prefer to learn. The seven multiple intelligences Gardner points to are interpersonal, intrapersonal, bodily-kinesthetic, spatial, musical, logical-mathematical and linguistic. We have the most success teaching our children when we can recognize their style of learning (as well as our style of teaching) and incorporate activities accordingly.

Playing and Learning
The main way children collect and process information is through play. Play is the repetition that reinforces old skills and encourages new ones. Because play is enjoyable, children’s minds are open. Children are capable of much learning through play because they are very receptive and relaxed. Take advantage of this benefit and select activities that are fun and educational. Your children will learn, and you will both enjoy the experience.

About The Author
Shelley Ruiz is a homeschooling parent and the owner of Magic Lark Learning which provides parents and teachers with resources for making learning fun, including a free quarterly online journal of poems and stories for kids. anything@magiclarklearning.com.

When was the last time you and your kids rolled around on the floor together laughing yourselves silly? If you’re like me, it may have been a while! Sometimes I get caught up in household chores, give errands a priority or answer the phone when I know I should let it ring, instead of making time for my two daughters. It’s not that I don’t play with them; just the opposite is true. It simply seems as if I’m trying to fit them into my daily schedule when in fact I should be scheduling my day around them. I used to be a planner. I would try to organize activities that I thought my girls would learn something from. I’m now much more free and spontaneous with them and I’ve discovered that at their respective ages of four and 20 months that this is the type of play they prefer. Here are some suggestions on how you can be more spontaneous with your children:

1. Play “Chase Around The House” – Kids love to be chased, especially if you’re making a roaring or growling noise while you’re doing it. You’d be surprised how fast their little legs can carry them. This exercise is sure get you’re heart rate up and tone your glutes as well! 
2. Have a Pillow Fight – Make sure the pillows are small and not too heavy. Throw cushions work best for this activity. Lay a few ground rules, such as not hitting in the face or on the head and when somebody yells: “stop”, then stop.
3. How Many Times Can Each of You Hop on One Foot – Again, a great cardiovascular activity for you and the kids. Alternate feet and vary the directions you’re hopping in. This is good for your children’s coordination and learning left and right, forwards and backwards. 
4. Pretend You’re Animals – Play a guessing game of what animal Sally is by the sounds she makes and the way she moves. Children love to imitate animals and can imitate various animals from a young age. 
5. Tickle Each other when you’ve run out of ideas, then a good old-fashioned tickle fight is the answer. Again, don’t tickle too hard and when someone (possibly you!) yells stop, then the tickler must stop. At our house, this game always ends with a kiss!

These activities take little time play and benefit you and your children greatly. They are highly interactive, involve a lot of laughter and take no preparation. They also let your children know that you enjoy being with them and that they make great playmates.

About the Author
Heidi Hoff is the editor of Preschool Planet. Subscribe and get “100 Things to Make From a Cardboard Box” free!

If you ever walk through an orphanage, it will be an experience you’ll never forget. Witnessing children in poverty, children discarded, children stunted both physically and emotionally, will stir your heart beyond belief. And adopting a child is a joy as great as witnessing the first sharp intake of breath by your very own newborn infant.

The suffering of orphans vary from country to country, but even in the US, where conditions are as good as they get outside of Western Europe, less than 20% of those that age out of the foster care system are completely self-sufficient as young adults.

The conditions elsewhere are sad and sadder, and the need for families to take these children home is dire, in some cases a matter of life and death. The orphans in Sierra Leone bear pain and suffering that no human being should have to endure. Food, potable water, and healthcare are in short supply. The median age in Sierra Leone is 17. Due to war and shortages of food supply, many of these children won’t make it to that median age.

Children waiting for adoption in Sierra Leone
The future looks bleak for even the average orphan. In Russia, 40% of the orphans who never find homes as children become homeless as adults, and 10% commit suicide after aging out of the system.

For those with special needs the future is even grimmer. Disabilities are not tolerated anywhere in the world as well as they are in the United States. Wheelchair ramps and accessible public bathrooms are just a couple of outward signs of how integrated our society is. In many countries, special needs orphans will never leave the institution. In Russia, they are considered incurable invalids and put in a sanatorium for life. Kimberly Reese described the situation in both Hungary and Bulgaria, “I saw NO special needs people ANYWHERE outside the orphanages.”

Susan Buchholz adopted from Vietnam twice. Both of her Vietnamese daughters are special needs children. The only people she saw outside the orphanage with disabilities were those peddling postcards to tourist.

She also witnessed many children begging on the streets. This image still haunts her. Poverty is a way of life in Vietnam. She describes bringing home her second daughter, Teresa. “Even at 14 months of age, she had only had formula and “rice soup” which I imagine to be a kind of rice cereal. Thai, from International Mission of Hope, told us that Vietnamese families do no teach their children to feed themselves until they are 7 or 8 years old to limit their intake of food. He said the teachers in the younger grades also feed their students for the same reason.”

Bulgaria’s orphans suffer emotional neglect. Kimberly Reese adopted two children from Hungary and one from Bulgaria. “Ella’s orphanage in Bulgaria was awful. I can say that both of my Hungarian children were well cared for and came home very stable emotionally. My Bulgarian child was clearly mistreated. …she was like a wild animal. It was very sad.”

Nikki from Hungary, and Ella from Bolivia. Like Susan, Kimberly adopted special needs children. Kimberly’s oldest child, Nikki, is missing most of her left hand. Nikki was offered to Kimberly and her husband by the adoption agency and since they didn’t think her special need was a big deal, they accepted her. “Once we got Nikki home, we realized that these kids rarely ever get adopted in Europe– unless by Americans. Nikki is so wonderful. We requested special needs after that.” Ella’s special needs were emotional. Their youngest, David, was adopted from Hungary and doesn’t have any hands. “Because both Nikki and David have upper limb deformities, Ella always wants to be just like them. Strange, isn’t it? She wants a hand like Nikki’s or arms like David’s. I have seen her try to eat or drink using her elbows like David.”

These disabilities are a part of a natural life to Susan’s and Kimberly’s families. Life is a joy with their beautiful children, and if anything the disabilities create laughter. “One of the funniest comments I remember was when we first brought Nikki home. My cousin had adopted two kids form the states and we were having a party to celebrate. We were at the pizza place and my little cousin said, ‘Kim, don’t panic! They have got to be here somewhere!’ He was so serious that I started to get concerned as he almost frantically looked around for something. I said, ‘what is it, baby?!’ He said, ‘I’m sure Nikki had them when she came in but she has dropped three of her fingers!’ It was a scream!”

Many parents choose international adoption just for this reason. They can offer a better– a much better– life to a child from an underprivileged country. They can see an angel where others have only seen an invalid. They can offer steak and chocolate cake to a child that has hungered for rice.

Hundreds of thousands of children are waiting for families to rescue them from coming of age in an orphanage. For most the wait is futile.

Sadder yet are the potential matches between orphans and families that go unpaired. There are thousands of families with the financial and emotional resources it takes to raise another child. They are willing and eager to care for and love a child as their own but unable to come up with the large adoption fees required upfront. The $20,000 price tag is a hard hurdle to overcome.

Many adopting families beg and borrow enough to cover these initial fees from families and friends. Those who are able to cash in their IRAs or take out a second mortgage are fortunate. Some run up credit card debt to cover adoption fees. Many give up and never consider adopting again.

The road to adoption is steep, but the rewards are tremendous. Imagine giving a child a warm bubble bath before bed. Now imagine that this is a brand new experience for your child. Warm bath water is a luxury many of these children never know.

Even if you are unable to adopt a child yourself you can still make a difference by donating to a children’s charity which offers adoption grants to families adopting older or special needs children.

About The Author
Tanya Sturman is the volunteer director for A Child’s Desire, Inc., a 501 c(3) children’s charity. A Child’s Desire offers adoption grants to children waiting over a year in an orphanage for a family to choose them. More information can be found at www.aChildsDesire.org. grants@achildsdesire.org

Haven’t you noticed that if you do not take care of yourself by having enough time for yourself you are much more irritable with your mate and children? Whether your job is being with your children all day, or you work out of the home all day, or you work in your home and tend to your children all day – you need some time for yourself.

When my children were small it was challenging to find the time for myself. I worked at home, tended to my children, and had very little money for household help. Yet if I didn’t have time to myself to read, take a bath, do creative stuff or just stare at a flower, I had a hard time being a patient, loving and fun mom.

What I did at that time is seek out adolescents who loved playing with little kids. I hired them (for not a lot of money – they were delighted to earn a little spending money and get to play with children as well) to play with my kids while I was in the house taking time for myself. After an hour or so of restful or creative time, I was filled up enough within to be able to give to my children. When I didn’t take this time, my own Inner Child would feel unloved, unimportant and resentful.

A part of good parenting is letting your children know that their needs are neither more nor less important than yours. In the past, children were supposed to be seen and not heard and were given the message that adults were more important than children. In more recent times, many children are given the message that their needs and feelings are more important than adults’ needs. Neither message is based on the truth of the equality of each soul. For children to understand this equality, parents need to role model loving their children and loving themselves – not one at the expense of the other. If children are taught that adults are more important then children, the children learn to be caretakers, putting themselves aside in deference to others. If children are taught that children are more important than adults, they learn to be brats, demanding attention and not caring about others. This is just one of the reasons why it is so important for parents to take responsibility for caring about themselves – for lovingly parenting the child within.

It might be helpful to imagine that you have an actual child that lives inside you. You are the mom and dad for this child. You are the only one who can feel and hear this child’s needs and who can take action on behalf of this child. You already know what happens if you ignore the needs of your actual children. In some way or another, they will act out until they get the love and attention they need. The same is true for your Inner Child. Our Inner Child, which is our feeling self, can even cause us to be sick if we don’t pay attention to him or her. Your Inner Child lets you know when you are not being loving to him or her with anxiety, stress, anger, or resentment. When you are feeling these feelings, instead of looking outside yourself for the cause, look at whether or not you are lovingly parenting yourself. It is one of the best things you can do for you and for your children. (For help in self-parenting through the Inner Bonding process, See our FREE Course at www.innerbonding.com).

About the Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including “Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: www.innerbonding.com or margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

A family memory journal is a fun, easy way to preserve family memories. A couple of years ago I was sorting through a pile of unused journals (many given to me as presents!) and was trying to come up with a way to put them to good use.

One day after a family gathering, I sat down and wrote a short description of the gathering in one of the unused journals. I wrote where the gathering took place, the occasion we were celebrating, the names of the people who had attended, and anything about the day that had stood out in my memory. I did this for the next couple of family get togethers and then just stuck the journal in a drawer somewhere.

It didn’t seem like that big of deal at the time, but probably a year or more later I pulled out the journal again and looked at the entries I had made. It was really fun reading them again. I had already forgotten some of the things that had happened, or thoughts that I had at the time that fortunately I had thought to write down.

I’ve been really forgetful about writing in my family memory journal, but in the past couple of years have probably chronicled two or three family events a year. When you think about it, 25 years from now, the journal will be full of family memories.

Family journals are a great thing to pass down to your children and grandchildren. At the time they don’t really care about what’s going on, but some day they will appreciate being reminded of some of their childhood memories.

In the past year or so I’ve really gotten into scrapbooking. I was just thinking that my memory journal will be a great resource for my scrapbooking projects. Sometimes it takes months to get your photos ready and pages laid out. By that time you will forget any memories you had to go along with them. If you have your family memory journal, you can use it to add journaling to your scrapbook pages, with your memory as clear as if you had taken the pictures yesterday.

Don’t let time pass you by and let those special family moments get away from you. Sometimes an event as routine as “another family birthday party” might make a great memory later in life. Especially when older relatives start passing away, it’s special remembering the times they were involved in family get togethers. Someday when you’re that older person, your youngest family members will enjoy reading about their great- and great-great grandparents.

About The Author
Rachel Paxton is a freelance writer and mom who is the author of What’s for Dinner?, an e-cookbook containing more than 250 quick easy dinner ideas. For recipes, tips to organize your home, home decorating, crafts, and more, visit Creative Homemaking.

Our children are being bombarded with candy from every direction. Chocolate bars, gum, suckers, and assorted gummy candies line the checkout lanes in grocery stores. School fundraisers sell candy bars, cookies, and brownies in the hallways during lunch hours. Every mall, skating rink, soccer complex, movie theater, and even the video store has a place to buy candy.

And then there is the holidays. Halloween trick or treat bags bulge with every kind of candy imaginable. Christmas stockings are topped with bubble gum and chocolate bars. Valentine messages are stamped on candy hearts and boxes of candy are the staple of communicating love. Easter baskets overflow with jellybeans and chocolate bunnies.

Candy is everywhere and its presence wreaking havoc on our children’s teeth and waist lines. Children are visiting the dentist with serious tooth decay at younger and younger ages every year. Obesity in children is a national concern.

With candy being universally available and regularly within sight of children, what is a parent to do? How do you combat its influence on your children? How do you lessen the influence of advertisers and get candy consumption under control in your family? How can you win the candy wars?

The following suggestions can assist you in curbing your children’s candy consumption. Use them to increase the health and well-being of your family.

1. Begin by being a model for your children to follow.

If you are a chocoholic and find yourself foraging through the cupboard for the last chocolate bar or eating an entire bag of M & M’s once they are opened, reflect on the message you are sending your children. It will be difficult for you to curb your children’s candy consumption when they see you unable to curb your own. So model the message. Eat a small portion of candy and set the rest aside for later. Talk to your children about your desire and your willingness to stay conscious and make healthy choices about your own candy consumption. The positive images you give them on how to set candy aside will help them to be more likely they are to set it aside themselves.

2. See candy as a wonderful opportunity to set limits with your children.

As parents we set limits around television, computer time, video games, bed times, friends, and a variety of other items. Setting limits with candy does not mean you make if totally off limits. It means that you provide opportunities for your children to enjoy candy within some clearly defined parameters or guidelines.

Children want guidelines. They thrive on structure. It is the structure provided by the adult that allows them, to relax into being a child. Of course they will push and test the limits. That is there job. Pushing and testing the limits does not mean that your children want them changed. It most often means that they want to see if the structure is really in place.

Set your limits early before you go to the store, before the Easter bunny arrives, before the Halloween bags are full, before you bring candy into the house. “We will be buying one treat today in the store,” sets the limit. So does, “We are shopping for food today. This will be a non-candy trip.”

Discuss with your children how candy consumptions will take place before they head out to gather a bag full at Halloween time. Agree on a portion to be eaten each day and a place to keep it. Do not allow candy to be taken into their bedroom. Do not leave bags of candy in the cupboard for easy access. This is part of setting limits and it is your responsibility as a conscious, committed parent to see that it is done.

Setting a limit doesn’t means you have to say, “No.” Sometimes saying, “Yes,” with a qualifier, helps you avoid power struggles.

“Yes, you can have one right after supper.”

Another important way to set limits and structure candy consumption in your family while reducing resistance and resentment is to offer children choices.

3. Offer your children choices when it comes to candy consumption.

“You can choose five pieces of candy out of your Halloween bag for today and set the rest aside for a different day. Let spread all your candy out and look at your choices.”

“You can choose one piece of candy now or two pieces of candy for after supper. You decide.”

“You can choose to have your Easter basket candy kept in the kitchen cupboard where we can keep track of it or you can choose to be done having access to your candy.”

With candy, remind your children that responsibility equals opportunity. Your children have an opportunity to have some candy. If they are responsible with following the parameters you have set then the opportunity continues .If they choose not to be responsible with candy, they choose to lose the opportunity to have it available. In that instance, access to candy is removed.

This could mean you may have to remove all the candy from the house and make it unavailable to anyone. That would include you.

4. Make the eating of candy something special.

Educate your children that candy is not food. It is junk and has no nutritional value for their bodies. Candy and the opportunity to eat it is something special and are reserved for special moments. Keep candy eating rare and enjoyable. Once the line is crossed and candy becomes an everyday occurrence, specialness of it wears off and it presence is now expected..

Have different candy around at different times to bring attention to the special event that the candy may represent. Focus on the event and how different types of candy are significant at different times of the year. Talk about the cultural or family significance of what a particular type of candy may represent. Change the focus from that of mass consumption to that of significance to you and your family.

5. Don’t use candy as a reward.

When you use candy to motivate your children to perform a particular task or behave in a certain way, you are positioning it as a tool of manipulation. Using candy to get children to behave is a form of bribery and produces children who perform for a substance. In this way you end up producing a “candy junky,” someone who chases after the next fix of the desirable substance.

Candy should never be used as a reward by parents, teachers, or any professional working with children. This distorts the role candy should have in a young person’s life and teaches children that the reward (in this case candy) is more important than the task performed..

6. Help your children create an inner authority.

You are not always going to be present when your children have access to candy. You are not going to be there to enforce a limit for your children or give them choices. You want the ability to curb candy consumption to already be inside them. This control for within will develop in children if you can start early and consistently utilize the suggestions above.

Another way to help your child build inner controls is to debrief or talk through your child’s choices with him after he returns from a place where you know candy is easily available. Help him think about and talk through his decisions. Ask him to articulate what he would want to keep the same and what he would like to different next time. Help him create a plan to build on his successes.

Your child’s inner authority is the only authority she will take with her wherever she goes Help her learn to trust her ability to decide and make healthy, responsible choices.

By following these six suggestions you and your children can enjoy the wonderful taste of chocolate and other candies. The holidays can be filled with pleasant moments of special candy consumptions. The “candy wars” will no longer be necessary. Instead, eating candy will move from a weight and tooth decay issue to a wonderful time when one can simply enjoy a sweet taste upon the pallet.

About the Authors:
Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose. They also publish a FREE email newsletter for parents and another for educators. Subscribe to them when you visit, http://www.chickmoorman.com or http://www.thomashaller.com. Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are two of the world’s foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children. For more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit their websites today.

Consumers
It is believed that most of the pesticides infants and young children come in contact with come from non-organic baby food,non-organic fruits and vegetables. These products are treated with pesticides, artificial preservatives and other additives. Studies show that simply by replacing your non-organic foods with organic you can decrease the risks of pesticide levels dramatically. There has been much controversy over the safety of pesticides, leading to many families choosing organic produce for their home.

Environmental
Organic foods are also beneficial for the environment. Organic produce is not treated with pesticides, reducing the chemical levels released into our environment. Some pesticides can be harmful to animals and humans in or around the area. Organic farms also sustain a more diverse ecosystem without chemicals that potentially may kill plants, insects and other animals. Organic farms also conserve more energy and produce less waste, as they do not dispose of packaging for additives.

Producers
The lack of pesticide use on organic farms has huge health benefits for workers. When used correctly, pesticides get into the air, and are then breathed by workers. Resulting in medical conditions including abdominal pain, dizziness and headaches. Some believe long term exposure to pesticides contribute to cancer in some patients.

While organic foods are still in their infanthood, all of the long and short term benefits are not known. One would be pressed to argue the obvious fact that lack of pesticides and artificial additives make organic foods a better choice for ones’ family. Many families opt for organic foods, despite the slightly higher costs, feeling it is safer and healthier for their children and loved ones.