Baby, Pregnancy, and Parenting at Babies Online » full-time

Working Full Time through Pregnancy

admin — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 23:52:27 +0000

It’s not easy working a full time job throughout your pregnancy. You may be at work out of choice, or out of necessity, but either way you need to take some extra precautions in taking care of yourself during the coming months.

It is very important to keep your stress level as low as possible during this time, and that’s not always easy. You will find yourself prioritizing your activities, and filtering out unnecessary tasks. My work schedule isn’t particularly demanding, but I have had to cut down on evening activities in order to make time for exercise and extra rest, two things that don’t come very easily to me.

When you’re supermom, taking time for extra rest is extremely important. When I first found out that I was pregnant, I had to keep reminding myself that I needed to slow down and rest more, including going to bed earlier. I resisted a little until I discovered that I am expecting twins. After recovering from that shock (I still haven’t), I decided that no activities were more important than getting my much needed rest. Rest is something you may not getting much of after your baby is born.

Don’t be afraid to ask for extra help around the house, with pet chores (don’t touch that litter box!), laundry, cooking, dishes, etc. Your husband and older children are perfectly capable of helping out, and will probably be more than happy to if you ask. Or, it just might not get done occasionally. My husband is getting used to the fact that he is “on his own” for dinner a night or two out of each week when I’m not hungry or can’t bear to cook.

Exercise is also very important, especially if you work in front of a computer all day. If you are able to join a family court club, they have many activities to choose from for the whole family. Ours offers a prenatal water aerobics class. If you can’t afford the monthly dues, often you can pay a one-time fee for a particular class. At the very least, get out and walk as much as you can, during your lunch hour or in the evenings.

I’m still in the first stages of pregnancy where most food doesn’t sound very appetizing. My tastes are constantly changing. I try to bring a variety of foods to work with me so that something will sound good when it’s time to eat. Lately I have been eating dried fruits, instant oatmeal, canned fruit cocktail, bananas, apples, tuna and sprouts on a wheat bagel, and chicken cup-of-soup. The hardest thing for me is drinking the 8 plus cups of water a day. I feel like I’m going to float away and hate getting up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I have been assured that drinking all this water will keep me from getting too bloated later in the pregnancy.

It can be hard to find good maternity work clothes. Look for local consignment stores and on Ebay.com. You will find a lot of great deals there and not have to pay “new” prices. Buy several pairs of neutral pants that will go with any top, and that will help save on your wardrobe.

Now is the time to start looking into your employer’s maternity benefits, if any. I have 6 weeks short-term disability I can use, at 66% of my current income. Income taxes, 401K, etc., are not deducted. If you plan ahead, you can take the time off you need without a large financial burden. Find out ahead of time what paperwork needs to be filled out and by when. Your doctor may need to fill out some of the paperwork for you.

If someone is to fill in for you while you’re away from the office, plan ahead and make sure someone knows what you do every day. My doctor told me I could be in bed as early as 6 months, and I have to plan on that even if it doesn’t happen. Don’t leave your employer without a replacement, if possible.

Don’t be afraid to get up and walk around when you need a break or to kick your shoes off under your desk when no one’s looking. Hopefully your employer is watching out for you and wants to help you through a successful pregnancy.

About the Author
Rachel Paxton is a freelance writer, mom, and owner of several home and family web sites. To sign up for her bi-weekly newsletter and to find complete resources for the Christian home, visit her web site at http://www.Christian-Parent.com.

Tips For New Moms

admin — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 19:48:01 +0000

This is the newest article of our Mom to Mom series (well, actually it’s the first!) We asked our members,

What tips would you give a brand new mom?

The responses we saw most often were:

Trust Your Instincts
Breastfeed
Cherish Every Moment
Join a Parenting Community
Sleep when your baby sleeps
Have pre-made meals handy
Try to rest and relax

And here is how it broke down …

From our Forums

LaurenOlalde: Advice that many gave me but I didn’t believe, “Time goes by so fast.” The first year has come and gone and my once newborn is now a toddler, I cant even begin to explain where the time has gone.

KimPossible: Write everything down because you will forget a few months/years later.

Editor’s Note – or add them to your Babies Online Milestones Tracker!

BreezyChas: NEVER wake a sleeping baby….and NEVER hold a sleeping baby (well for long) … In my experience with mine….with our first we held her all the time when she was sleeping because she was new and she would never sleep without someone holding her. With my second we didn’t hold her as much when sleeping and she slept a lot better…by my third…he’d sleep all night in his crib because we didn’t hold him while sleeping…

oceangirl: Trust your instincts.

KimPossible: Don’t be afraid to question your child’s pediatrician or to disagree with him, you are the parent and have the final say. Do your research, ask other parents for advise you might be surprised what you learn. Join a parenting message board!! The knowledge and info you learn/receive is priceless!! Do reviews on products before making a purchase. You might find that something you think is cool but have gotten horrible reviews by other parents.

2CuteBoys: Always trust your instincts, IMO you can never spoil a baby enjoy her/him cause time does go by fast,cherish every moment,be open and honest with your kids,be paient with them…

Frances: My advice would be to take other people’s criticism with a grain of salt. Not everyone will agree with the way you parent YOUR baby… if you choose to breastfeed you may get negativity from people that formula feed or vice versa. As long as your baby is fed, clothed, loved, healthy, safe and happy there is no right or wrong way to parent. You have to do what is best and works for your family regardless of what others have to say. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel you are inferior because you don’t do things the way they did.

From our Twitter Friends

inklesstales Don’t let your mother or mother-in-law make you afraid. YOU’RE the mommy now. (2) Breastfeeding HURTS, but it doesn’t last, and then it’s very cool, and FREE, and healthier – & go ahead & do it in public. (3) Trust your instincts. You may not know medicine, you may not know much, but YOU KNOW UR BABY.

canadiancollect: Never brag when baby is sleeping well. You’ll jinx it!
rapidreasoning: Advice from someone who just gave birth…treasure every single moment with your new baby!!

Hide Conversation
BreastfedBabies: Join LLL so you can have breastfeeding friends and join MOMS Club so you can have Mom friends close by!
backwoodbarbie1: Sleep when they sleep.and you can never take to many pictures!!!

cindyambrose: If it’s someone close, pre-made meals. if not, maybe vouchers for a pizza place?

mommymichelle6: seek out experienced mom’s to act as mentors. Raising a child REALLY does take a village.

kaboogie: There’s ’nuff advice, not enough support. Do what makes sense, leave the rest behind.

Hide Conversation

Juicytots: stock your freezer with quick easy food

Soph4Soph: rest as much as you can & see a movie!!

CynSieWil: Stock your freezer with three weeks’ worth of dinners–you will NOT have energy to cook or shop
kaboogie: RELAX and use your natural instincts.

Hide Conversation
dancingsisters: Sleep when your baby sleeps. You don’t know when your next chance may be!

Hide Conversation
windwardskies: trust your instincts! All the books/advice in the world can’t compare to what you feel is right.

Bncngoffthwlls: The key to good parenting is to always know what your next best distraction will be! U always need 2 know what UR going 2 distract UR kids w/ BEFORE U do something that U know will cause meltdown!

From our Facebook Friends

I was surprised that our Facebook Fans were so quiet on this one, but we did get a few responses …

Renee H

My advice: Take time out for yourself! You don’t have to be “super-mom” like you think. The better you take care of yourself, the better you’ll take care of your little one!

Donna H

Nap when the little one sleeps

Jenni B

Go with your gut instinct. People will off you plenty of advice, but there is something to be said about a mother’s instinct – it’s usually right on.

Lori W

What I would tell a new parent: Read….read….read….oh, and relax and enjoy your child! Even though babies don’t come with “directions”, don’t worry that you’ll do something wrong. Your own “mother’s instinct” will kick in automatically without even thinking about it! Did I say read?…………..

From our Myspace Friends

Heather W

I would say just to take every moment you get with your baby and cherish it because they grow up so fast.

Rayne’s Mommy

Always remember when you feel you are having a bad day….Look at your baby and everything becomes better!

Karen

Don’t scream when the baby screams…it only makes things worse.

(Haha…sorry that was some advice I heard when I was prego with my first and I’ve always remembered it.)

Latoya G

Be prepared to sacrifice all the time you have to properly raise your little one, it won’t spoil him but it will make him smarter. & Good communications and loving attention by parents during a child’s early years are sure to reap lasting rewards

Desiree Annette

Well, I myself am a new mother. My baby’s 6 months old, so I thought I’d give a little advice for the newer moms…In the beginning first couple of months, they don’t sleep through the night and need to be diaper changed, and feed. I tried breastfeeding but it just seemed way to taxing on me on top of being a new young single mom. Sometimes I felt like I was going nuts! I just wanted to say that it gets better, trust me! Oh, and to just enjoy your baby in the moment because before you know it they’ll be all grown up…babies grow so fast!

The best is yet to come!

Don’t compare your baby to others. Every baby is different and will reach each milestone when they are good and ready.

Janelle

My tip for a first-time Mom would be: When you give your messy baby a bath, wash the clean parts first. You don’t want to end up with carrots (or poop) everywhere!

Rachel Briggs

Breastfeeding gets better in time. Nurse whenever the little one wants to boost milk production. It may hurt like heck in the beginning but the pain subsides!

Rå¢hêlLêê

*Well first off don’t be afraid to ask for help!

*Do what you feel is right No matter who is saying not to.

*Don’t be afraid to lay the baby down, you do not have to hold them for the first year of life.

*Crying is ok. Some cries are needed to strengthen the lungs.( not all cries are though)

*Keep your faith in it all. When times get rough and you feel like there is no rest coming for you. Wait it will.

*Don’t feel guilty because you ask for help so you can rest.(If you can not function due to lack of sleep Who will care for your children?)

*DO listen to advice given some of it may be useful one day.You may not want to believe it but Your Mother & Mother-in-laws do give good advice sometimes.

*Just because you gave birth doesn’t mean you gave up on all the things you wanted to do or wanted to have. DO what you love if it requires no children,get a sitter. Do not feel bad about still doing things for yourself.

*Take Pride in your new life with baby. Be Brave,Strong,Courageous! They are all you have and they need you to protect them at all cost!

* When they are old enough to tell you to shut-up or tell you NO or repeat things they hear DO NOT feel bad about time outs or a tap on the buns to let them know its not ok. DO not be afraid to discipline. It helps guide them to be the people we want them to be and helps them to distinguish from right and wrong!!

*Last but not least *** LOVE *** with your heart n soul and give hugs and kisses and praise every chance you get! Your not promised today nor tomorrow so live life to the fullest and don’t be afraid to say what you mean and mean what you say!Protect and Love at all cost!

Sarah

Read lots of books! really need to know what to expect! and take lots of pics!

Rachy

Where to start. Well, being a first time mother myself, I would have to say do not expect to stick to any one plan. We all envision what we want for our children and in most cases will go to great lengths to achieve this. This can sometimes come at a great cost though. I cannot even begin to calculate the hours of sleep that I have lost, or the amount of credit card debt I have incurred to keep my little one healthy, happy, and in style (yes, buying that $300 stroller that everyone gawks at but my daughter could care less about). My advice is:

Do not be afraid to ask for help. Although you may feel like it is your responsibility to care for your child, do not let it wear you down. This does not create a winning situation for anyone. If your tired and cranky, chances are, baby is going to be tired and cranky.
Be a savvy shopper. Although we all want to give are children the best things in life, they are not going to care those first few years. I have spent thousands of dollars buying the hottest items, including dozens of toys. Where did this get me? Well, my daughter likes to play with the t.v. remote, plastic dishes, and paper. Yes, all of those wonderful toys are sitting in various toy boxes, most freshly out of the box. As for all of the beautiful and expensive clothes, well lets just say we go out about 2 nights a week for about 3-4 hours each time. This has left me dressing my daughter in comfortable (and cheap) onesies, and pajamas for a majority of the time. There is no point in dressing your baby up in uncomfortable clothing when they are just sitting at home playing.
Accept any and all help from dad. Even if he dresses your baby up in the first thing he finds, say a pink shirt with orange shorts, at least it saved you five minutes fighting with the baby to get his/her clothes on. Also, this helps dad to build a bond with your baby. I think that this is especially helpful for mothers who breastfeed. I myself have breastfed my daughter from day 1. She has never had a drop of formula and only two bottles of expressed breastmilk. Yes, I have to get up every single night to feed her plus all of the countless feedings during the day. Although this has helped me to build a wonderful bond with my child, it has also created some resentment from her father. My child has learned that mommy provides food and comfort so she tends to cling to me more than her father. So, the solution to this was to find other ways for them to bond and also ways for me to get a break from taking care of all of the responsibilities. He does a majority of the diaper changes when he is home and will often get her dressed. Once she started eating solids he would feed those to her, wwhile creating a nice little mess for me. So, even though dad may not always make the best judgment in fashion, or seems to create more of a mess than it is worth, remember that it is important for him to take part in your babies life.
My final bit of advice is to just have fun and enjoy every minute. In the first few months I would try to keep everything clean and disinfected and would freak out about anyone who sneezed near my baby. I would also check on my daughter every five minutes while she slept to make sure she was breathing. This created a lot of stress for me which in turn was expressed by my daughter. I have since learned that you cannot control natures elements. It is almost a guarantee that your baby will catch colds and will make a new mess two seconds after you clean up the first one. You also lose out on valuable playtime with your child when you try to make sure every household task is complete. So, forget about cleaning the house everyday or trying to get every last piece of laundry washed. Instead, aim for less ritiualistic terms so that you can cherish as much time with your child as possible. The time goes by quick and there are no second chances of getting it back. Focus on loving your baby and although there are many things that can be prevented, such as pool drownings and poisonings, do not fret about ever little thing. Let him or her play in the dirt or get messy while eating. It is a learning experience for both of you so take it one step at a time.

Rachel Kurowski

So there you have it!

Moms around the world giving you their most valuable tips. What golden nuggets do you have to share with other new moms?