by Alan M. Hess

Strange as it may sound, boredom promotes happier, creative kids who are better problem solvers. When children use their own creativity with unstructured play, they find ways to amuse themselves — even if it means simply daydreaming.

That’s the advice of child development expert, Alan M. Hess who wants to see American children spend more time in unstructured play, less time in structured activities and much less time in front of mindless TV programs. Hess states, “Plain and simple, it’s called creative child development. I recognize that in our society, it’s a hard concept for people to grasp at first.

“Many American parents who work 60 to 70 hours a week impose a very structured lifestyle on their children. They’re concerned about boredom, so they over schedule to keep kids busy. Believe it or not, there is a direct relationship between boredom and creative thought.”

Alan Hess, president of Safari Ltd., with its line of museum quality creative toys, is a noted authority and respected expert in developing creative play for children. Hess states, “Think back to when you were a kid and you will recall valuable lessons. Left to our own devices we discovered resources we didn’t know we had. I’m concerned that our busy, well-entertained children may not ever have the chance to learn them.”

Hess, states, “Although most of the products that I’ve been involved with are designed for children four and up, especially our current Safari line of products, I constantly study toddler trends. Several pediatric physicians, who are part of our research team, have shared some disturbing trends with me regarding middle and upper class parents who push their children to the extremes in the hopes that this will provide a better foundation for the child’s future.

“They’ve told me about situations where parents are determined to find the “perfect three year old” pre-school so that their daughter will be prepared for law school later in life. Other parents make their children compete in soccer matches and karate competition when the child is recovering from the flu. Their misguided reasoning is that the child needs to learn what competition means, regardless of illness, or circumstances. This thinking is insane.”

Hess firmly believes that children need time to be children. Creativity, social skills and fun are vital to a well-rounded child. He suggests that parents help children get the most out of unstructured play by limiting TV. Parents might also provide materials, creative toys and even gentle suggestions, if necessary. Parental guidance and parental participation is also important. Hess said, “Bored kids eventually take out the paints, build a dinosaur den, read a book … and create things, or they come home sweaty from a game of neighborhood soccer. Our educational, nature and science toys with a special focus on scale-model animal and dinosaur replicas are big favorites with children. They love the fantasy play and the fun of creating their own world.”

This concept of boredom is new territory at the beginning because children may be upset that they can’t watch TV. They may also bicker with their siblings. Hess states, “Working or single parent households may have even more of a challenge, but he strongly encourages parents not to give in and flip on the TV, or let kids watch a video.”

The lifelong benefits of unstructured play are so great that Hess urges parents to try to find an hour a week for it. And he offers these tips to make things easier:

Set Limits to TV and Video Play. There is something very wrong with the fact that many children watch an average of 38 hours per week. Cutting back can provide unstructured play time. Most parents and care takers passively allow the media to routinely expose kids to violence and sex when they would never let an individual, or educational institution expose their children to this type of content.

Far too many children spend hours each day at computers, playing with hand-held game devices, or watching videos. Hess suggests that parents set a firm daily limit to these activities. Hess says, “The value of a toy is simple to calculate…to what degree does the toy invite imagination and creativity? After a week, if you find that your child is more interested in playing with the toy box instead of the toy, you’ve wasted money and time.”

Unstructured play time doesn’t require a huge investment in new toys. Hess cites one focus group study where two boys were playing with toys. One girl had an electronically enhanced dinosaur and she boasted: “My dinosaur can say 500 words!” The other boy, who was holding a Safari dinosaur countered with: “My dino can say anything I want it to say and it looks like a real dino.”

Hess states, “We hear so much about hyperactive children who are medicated as a result of this behavior. Is the child really hyperactive, or does the child simply need more unstructured play time? Children are free spirits and when that’s denied, we see physical and mental manifestations that have a negative impact on a healthy childhood.

“Spend time watching your child play. This can show children that adults value their play,” Hess says. It’s not necessary to join in, although that’s great fun too, as long as parents don’t try to take over. In fact, one highly successful parenting strategy involves spending time each day with your child doing whatever he or she chooses to do.”

During this “special time,” the child makes the decisions, controls the flow of the play and assigns all roles. It’s unstructured play time for your child, yet you get to participate. It’s important for us to share time with children and it shows them that you value their play.

Hess encourages parents to give this boredom concept a serious try. He states, “Giving your children a break from organized activities and electronic baby-sitters could very well mean sentencing them to boredom, at least at first, but it will open up a whole new world of creativity, fun and adventure as it helps them expand their minds.”

About The Author
Alan Hess, president of Safari Ltd., has an extensive marketing background with a wide array of highly successful toy and hobby products. One of the key factors in his success is his understanding of child development research and his ability to apply that knowledge to product development.

by Vivian Dee

How do one give the perfect gift? Ahh! Another occasion, another milestone…excitement is building, adrenaline is pumping; and off one goes shopping. But what should you get for a cousin’s birthday, another shirt, another bag or a perfume? Gift giving can be exciting and nerve wrecking as well. But when all is said and done. There’s nothing like the satisfaction of giving the perfect gift.

What can you do to ensure the celebrant and the gift are a perfect fit? Here are some tips on gift-giving. Prepare ahead of time. Mark it in your calendar and be alerted about few weeks before time. This will give you sometime to think your gift through. Know the celebrant, make sure you find out if; she or he has a special hobby or interest. Is he or she engage in a very physical strenuous job? Does she put in long hours at work? If so, would she appreciate a little extra pampering?

Remember all the little occasions worth celebrating and keep them in mind to help you get started. Special days can be a birthday or anniversaries of your milestones you have accumulated through life. Here are some milestones that are often overlooked but should be celebrated, birthdays, because we are too busy to celebrate, weight loss-because you are too scared of putting the weight back and celebrating maybe premature.

Long friendships, when you quit smoking for the first time or the second time or perhaps the third, getting a project done on time, a new home, seeing your one year old walk for the first time, passing an exam, just finished redecorating the house, landscaped the entire yard, change of season, or just because.

Be sure to add new milestones in your calendar as it happens. Celebrating can in fact make us feel better, rejuvenate and strengthen our relationships with friends and families. It gives us a feeling of accomplishments. It validates us as a person. It gives us a sense of purpose. It also increases job satisfaction. And when this cycle goes on, it makes us a happier person and happy people are strongly correlated with good health. So take time to be healthy!

About The Author
Vivian Dee is the owner of PurpleEgg LLC.

Capturing the personality and spirit of your bright and bouncy baby in photographs is one of the more difficult things you can attempt if you don’t bring your imagination along for the ride. Photographs are rather two-dimensional. They do not allow consideration for personality, sound, and emotion that are always present when you are with your baby. However taking pictures of babies can be done in a manner that allows your baby’s personality to shine through if you are willing to let nature take its course during your ‘photo shoot’ rather than trying to control the situation.

How to “Set the Stage”
The first thing you want to keep in mind is that you want a stage upon which your baby can act not a setting for cameras and camera angles. You will want to include toys that are sure to delight your baby, make sure there is plenty of natural lighting (outdoor settings are great for a project such as this) and that your baby is well rested and in a good temper. If you choose a natural setting you should keep in mind that nature is its own stage to some degree. Capture your baby doing the things he or she loves to do and take plenty of photographs in the moments. Even if your baby is simply throwing sand in the air and running through it you will be amazed at how much his or her personality shines through those moments of glee when captured on film.

As a matter of fact, these moments are the stuff that baby photo contests are made of. When setting a stage upon which to take those perfect baby pictures you will want to make sure that the background doesn’t distract from the object of your affection. The less elaborate the background the better. You want your baby and her personality to shine in these photos. You should also make sure that she is interested in the process and having fun. Her personality will be the star if she is truly having fun.

Interaction and attention are great motivators when it comes to taking pictures of babies. If you want them to react to you and not the camera capture their interest and if at all possible keep the camera away from your face. This allows her to babble and play with you while doing it for the camera. Play with her toys in order to get her to begin playing with them. Once she’s engaged in the activity or the ‘play’ you can snap photos as fast as your fingers and your camera will allow in order to have plenty of selection while showing the most possible personality.

by Jennifer Cram

If you’re at the stage of wanting to organize a naming ceremony for your baby, then you already know that babies have their own schedule, which doesn’t always align with yours. At certain times of the day they are more sociable, more alert, and more amenable to the sort of activities a naming ceremony involves. For a baby this means being clean, being rested, and not being hungry.

Your first priority should be to work out the time of the day that your baby will be at his or her social best. This is often mid-morning or early afternoon, but not every baby keeps to the same timetable. So the primary consideration must be choosing a time for the ceremony which fits your individual baby’s feeding/sleep schedule.

A name giving ceremony must always be conducted on “baby time”. This means that as well as being scheduled at the best time for the particular baby, there must be enough time to pause the ceremony and tend to the baby’s needs (or the needs of another baby present) if the baby needs changing, feeding or generally soothing.

Celebrants also have schedules, and these frequently involve not only time of the day but day of the week. Here in Brisbane mid-afternoon on any Saturday between September and February is peak demand time for weddings (70% of weddings take place on a Saturday), which tends to result in celebrants who also do weddings being heavily booked. By contrast only about 20% of weddings happen on a Sunday, so scheduling your naming ceremony for a Sunday will mean you will have a greater choice of celebrant, and, if you are planning to have the ceremony in a park or other venue apart from your home or the home of a friend or relative, greater choice of venue, too. Scheduling your ceremony in the morning will also give you greater choice than the afternoon.

Other considerations may include

• A significant date. First birthdays are not uncommon, but it could equally well be another day of significance to you.
• The light. In Queensland, for example, the best light for outdoor photographs is the morning, so if you wish to have an outdoor naming photography might be important.
• Heat. The time of the day the area you want to use will be shaded should get priority in the hot weather.
• Work and other commitments of guests and participants, or travel arrangements for far-flung family and friends.
• Your time-line. If you are planning to schedule your ceremony in the near future you have to be far more flexible than if your proposed date for your ceremony is a long time off.

A good celebrant whose schedule fits yours, a relaxed and happy baby, and an environment that is comfortable for all guests, are the ingredients that make for a happy and relaxed ceremony. All it takes is a little bit of juggling.

Copyright © 2005 Jennifer Cram.

About the Author
Jennifer Cram is an accredited General Civil Celebrant based in Brisbane Queensland Australia where she specializes in performing one of a kind Naming Ceremonies as Beautiful as your Baby and other ceremonies. For more information about her naming ceremonies visit her website www.jennifercram.com and/or her Baby Naming Blog.

Article Source: EzineArticles.com

The babymoon period is that time during the first few weeks of a baby’s life when mom and dad fall madly in love with this cute little bundle of joy that they created. Its’ name is taken from “honeymoon” which is a time when a couple is happy, life is perfect, and normal marital everyday issues have not arisen yet.

When your baby is a newborn he probably doesn’t do much besides sleep. He awakens periodically to eat or get his diaper changed, but for the most part is awake very little and doesn’t interact much. This period can last generally from 2 weeks to one month of age.

Eventually the babymoon period will come to an end. Parents will still be in love with their babies, and the babies will bring a lot of love and laughter to the home, however, the baby may also bring tears. A quick way to bring an end to the babymoon period is with the appearance of colic in a baby. Even some babies who do not have colic may be gassy or just fussy, making it increasingly harder to get things done, and causing some frustration in parents because they can’t figure out what is wrong with their baby.

The babymoon is also referred too as a last little vacation for mom and dad before the baby comes or a time when new parents can break away from the baby for a short time, either for dinner, or a night at a hotel, just for themselves. It is important that new parents have this time together in order to focus on each other. It is too easy for new parents to lose focus of their relationship and not give time to improve on it.

Whenever your babymoon period starts and ends enjoy it. It won’t last forever, and in many cases it won’t last long enough. Soon the reality of a new baby will hit both mom and dad, along with the sleepless nights, and long tiring days.

Blankets, stuffed animals, pacifiers and more are often seen being drug behind toddlers and thrown in diaper bags all over the place. Security items can become an important part of some children’s lives, to a point where they are not happy, can not be settled, or will not go to sleep without their favorite item. This can make it hard on mom and dad however.

Security items bring comfort to babies and toddlers alike. A pacifier or bottle creates a sucking motion that often calms and puts a baby to sleep. This is especially true for babies who have been or are breastfed and found comfort and relaxation while nursing. What makes it hard is trying to take the bottle or pacifier away from a toddler that is attached to it and doesn’t want to let go.

A favorite toy can cause anxiety and tears when left at the park or forgotten at home when you head for an overnight visit to grandmas. Many kids will not go to sleep or calm down if they can not hold onto their first teddy bear, or stuffed animal they lovingly call, “Me Me” when they settle in for the night after hearing their favorite book. Without a distraction when this item is not there, a parent may have a very hard time getting their baby to go down for the night.

Whether you realize it or not, you probably do the same thing. When you get upset or anxious you may go looking for something to bring you some peace. Maybe you get that by reading a book, taking a bath or calling an old friend but when you find it you feel instantly better. This is what your baby is doing with his security item, making himself feel better.

At some point as a parent you will want to teach your child how to function without this object always having to be lugged along. You don’t want your kindergartener going to school with a pacifier in his mouth, or your preschooler not napping because he doesn’t have his blanket “whoopee”. There are many ways you can wean your kids off these items from doing it cold turkey to being gradual about it. Some believe cold turkey is too hard for the child, while other think out of sight out of mind is better than the tease of doing it gradually. As a parent you have to make the decision that is best for your family.

(NC)-Twinkle, twinkle little star. The Itsy bitsy spider. Hush little baby.

Mothers have always known that singing is an easy way to keep babies happy. But is there more to it than just silly rhymes and gestures?

Sandra Trehub at the University of Toronto seems to think so.

“Songs capture and hold babies’ attention more than ordinary speech does,” explains Trehub. “You can even see it-babies calm down and fix their eyes on the mothers when they sing. It’s a highly pleasurable experience for them.”

Trehub, a professor of psychology, has studied music in the lives of babies for the past thirty years. Her research, supported by the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council (SSHRC), shows that babies are more interested in lullabies than other songs and can even tell the difference between a real mother’s voice and a recording.

According to Trehub, mothers perform songs for their babies in a distinctive way. When they sing to their babies they add emotional qualities that are absent when they sing to others or to themselves.

“The baby’s presence influences the mother’s feelings and these feelings are reflected in her performance,” says Trehub.

Trehub is now working to determine whether babies’ attention to songs can be used to help them learn. She’s already discovered that babies as young as 13 months of age can be taught new words using songs.

So keep on singing those songs, moms! You and your children will be happier for it.

You can learn about other SSHRC-funded research on the Council’s Web site (www.sshrc.ca).

- News Canada

Yes your baby has it! Even if he doesn’t show it yet, your baby will have his own unique personality that will start appearing within the first few months of life. Once your baby is past the first few weeks when all he is doing is eating and sleeping it seems, his personality will start to peak through. By watching his early signs, you will be able to get a sneak peak at the personality that will develop.

The biggest part of a person’s personality is whether they are introverted or extroverted. A baby will often show a strong sense of this aspect of their personality from very early on. Does your baby seem to like the attention he gets from the outside world and people outside of your immediate family? Does he light up when people try to talk to him, or does he try to hide his head and start to cry when out of your arms or someone other than those living in the house try to hold him?

Some babies will take the opportunity to smile and laugh with every stranger that looks their way, while others are content to just look at mom and dad, while ignoring everyone else around them. If your baby is an extrovert he will thrive on attention from all sources, and if he is an introvert he will be happy just being left alone.

Some babies are high maintenance, wanting to constantly be held, played with, and given attention. As soon as their diaper is wet or full, they HAVE to be changed or they scream. Others are content to sit by themselves and wait for you to come to them, or patient enough to give you time to discover on your own that they need a diaper change and change it. This part of their personality probably won’t change much as they get older and will give you an insight of how your child will be as he grows.

Is your baby a ham? Does he grin his biggest whenever you pull out the camera or is getting a smile like pulling a tooth? Some babies love being the center of attention and laugh on cue. Your baby may try to make you laugh, especially as he gets older. He may put pots and pans on his head or start trying to pose for pictures, even before he is a year old. If this is the case your baby may very well turn out to be the class clown in school!

Some babies will not need a lot of interaction, or will quickly become over stimulated when given too much interaction. If this happens your baby may become fussy quickly, becoming happy again once he is left to himself, or given his favorite toy to play with. If this sounds like your baby be sure to give him his alone time when he seems to need it and be around to play when he is ready. 

It doesn’t matter if your baby is quiet and sits around waiting for you to notice him, or is active and rambunctious making sure EVERYONE notices him. Your baby will continue to develop his personality during the first few years and during his adolescence. It is important that you support and encourage him, no matter what personality traits he begins to display, as the reaction your baby gets is what will help him form into the person he will become.

By Mikael Rieck

Whether you are expecting your first child or you are a veteran parent with years of experience raising kids you have probably asked yourself the question “how will I go about keeping my baby as happy and smiling as possible?”

Well, I can’t give you a definite answer to that question because there are probably as many different answers as there are babies in the world. Every single human is unique but we do still have some things in common that you can benefit from. 

Firstly, you will have to provide your baby with the basic human needs. This includes the right amount and the right type of food, enough sleep, shelter etc. Without these basics you will have a hard time keeping your baby happy and you will probably experience more crying and screaming than you will see smiles and hear giggles.

Secondly, you will have to spend your time. Time is unfortunately on of the things that most people will never have enough of and the one thing that every human will certainly run out of at some point.

By “time” I mean that you will have to spend your time with your baby. After all you are the parent and I trust that this is in your own interest as well. One thing that is extremely important is that you do not you spend time because you “need to” but that you actually “want to”.

A baby or a child is a very sensitive being and they will see right through you if you don’t want to be with them. They are extremely good at reading “between the lines” because they still have their intuition.

When you provide you baby or child with genuine love and care you can be sure that it will come back to you ten-fold. If it doesn’t then you might want to take a look in the mirror and ask yourself the question “have I really given my unconditional love and care to my baby”?

If you feel that you have then you are on the right path. Surely there can be situations where other aspects kick in. The child can become sick, have slept poorly, have had to little to eat etc. Some of these things are just “life” and we all have to live with them.

The point is that love and care goes a long way and if you haven’t already tried it then I suggest that you give it a try. You might be surprised.

About the Author
Dr. Caron B. Goode is the founder of the Academy for Coaching Parents International, a training and certification program for parent coaches. In addition to duties with the academy, Goode is the founder of the website InspiredParenting.net, and the author of ten books, the most recent of which is Nurture Your Child’s Gift: Inspired Parenting and Help Kids Cope with Stress & Trauma. For more information on The Academy for Coaching Parents International or to sign up for academy announcements, visit www.acpi.biz.

By James Brann, MD

The old saying “babies aren’t born with instruction manuals” has opened the door for unwanted advice from family and friends, alike. If you’re a mother, specifically a “new” mother, at first you may appreciate the guidance of those that went before you. But eventually even the most patient of women will break. You will most likely become a hermit, hiding the car in the garage, locking the doors, turning the ringer off and avoiding anyone that perceives themselves as an “expert” on the subject of motherhood and newborns. So before you become a recluse and start avoiding all human contact; here’s some more advice on “unwanted” advice.

Often times, a new mother’s insecurities get the best of her, and in all honesty, this happens to all mothers; not just the “new” ones. As mothers, we’re always questioning our abilities to raise our children. You want the best for them and fear you’ll make bad choices, its human nature. Therefore, when someone offers advice or guidance, we often take their words as criticism. But in all reality, most family and friends mean to help, not judge. Open your mind to their words; ignore the little voice inside your head that says they’re judging you. In most instances, these same people have been giving you “unwanted” advice for years and you’ve never paid any attention to it. The insecurities of having a newborn often times warrants defensive behaviors when faced with unwanted advice. However, motherhood is a learning experience; it starts at the birth and never ends. Listening to family and friends that have walked in your shoes before can, however, be a soothing and rewarding experience.

Everyone will have opinions on certain circumstances and if you listen closely, even theirs will differ from one another. Pretty soon, you find yourself throwing your hands up and surrendering like General Lee. However, often times by educating yourself on what the actual “experts” say can eliminate the frustration and the insecurities that a new mom will face. Educating yourself on the best choices that you can make for your newborn can build self-confidence, self-respect, and sanity.

It is very important for mother’s to have a good relationship with their infant’s pediatrician, as well. Often times, the trust you put into your child’s doctor will help fight off those insecurities that you may have. A pediatrician sees most infants several times during the first few months of their lives. These are great opportunities for mother’s to ask questions. Keep a notebook handy, write down concerns that you have, or questions.

Lighthearted advice is just that, when given it’s meant to be taken as helpful hints and suggestions. However, in some instances, you will have family and friends insisting on “their way” of doing things. When this circumstance occurs, be prepared. Thank the person and tell them you will consider their advice, quote what you have read from child-rearing books, explain to them that you and your child’s pediatrician has discussed the matter and you’re following doctors orders. If all else fails, change the subject or leave the room.

In many circumstances, especially those that are short-term, you may consider following the person’s advice while they are present. In all reality, they will leave and when they do, so can their advice. Short-term circumstances that have no long-term effects are just that. They won’t warp or change the big picture. If your mother-in-law comes to your house to “help”, and suggests adding more blankets to the crib or turning the heat up because the baby looks cold, just go with it. When she does leave, you can quickly undo the heartfelt actions.

Often times, you may find yourself in a circumstance where all other methods of deterring an opinion or advice have failed. You have tried avoiding the subject, quoting a doctor or expert, and even ignoring the advice. But yet still, the person insists on you listening to them. It is at this time that you have to result to what I call, “the truth”. In the kindest fashion possible, you explain to them your honest feelings on the subject, you express gratitude that they care, but in all honesty, the child is yours and you know what’s best. If you’re uncomfortable saying this to someone; ask a friend, your husband, or another family member to talk to the person and explain to them your true feelings on the situation.

It’s important to surround yourself with positive people. If possible, find other mother’s that share your views and values. Then, as mother’s you can swap stories, not advice.

About The Author
Dr. James Brann is a board certified Obstetrician and Gynecologist and a Fellow of the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. He is also the Editor of Women’s Healthcare Topics an information source for all women.