It’s 8 o’clock at night, the kids are finally asleep. The floor is covered with toys and the trail of rejected dinner food items that ‘accidentally’ fell off the kids’ dinner trays. The sofa and the walls are sticky with jelly, the TV remotes are gone, the kitchen sink is overfilled with dishes and the laundry basket must be shrinking because it just doesn’t seem to be able to accommodate the 4 changes of kids clothes each of the boys went through today. I finally sit down and then I think to myself that I’m proud. I am not only proud of my 2 active boys, Ryan (3) and Gregory (1) but also of myself and the smart strategies I developed to help me along in the challenge of raising toddlers.

Here are a few of them:

Bring Them Outdoors
Have you noticed that the behavior of kids who stay indoors all day resembles that of a wild animal in captivity? The moods of my children change dramatically the moment they escape from the house and get the chance to roam at large in the wilderness of their back yard. The crankiness and clinginess disappear as soon as they step outside. Their tempers mellow and the pent up aggression fades away once they let off some steam by running wild. Being outdoors gives kids a sense of freedom and independence. Not only do they become more calm and quiet, but their appetites get a big boost as well.

Hide the Toys
We tend to buy more and more toys for our kids hoping each time we will find the one that keeps them occupied long enough for you to cook, clean, go to bathroom or simply relax (Relax? Keep dreaming!) The overabundance of toys actually creates a problem: Too many toys can make your child feel discouraged and less focused. Leave out just a few toys and hide the rest. Rotate them every 2-3 days. Exchange the toys after the kids are in bed and make it a morning surprise for them. You will notice how happy your toddler will be to see and play with the toys he or she had forgotten about.

Serve Fruit Snacks to Boost Their Appetites
One of the rules established in our house is NO SNACKING within 90 minutes of mealtime. Moms know that even a small snack given too close to a meal usually results in a plate full of uneaten food. There is something you can do to to give your child a snack and actually increase their appetite at the same time: Serve fruit snacks between meals. A fruit snack about 90 minutes before a meal will not only help to satisfy the kids’ hunger until mealtime, it will actually stimulate their appetites for dinner and make them anxious to eat. Grapes are the favorite choice for both of my boys but an apple, an orange, a peach or some pineapple works just as well. If your kids are accustomed to non fruit snacks, try to give it to them soon after a main meal and then serve the fruit snack 90 minutes before the next one.

Give Them Choices
This is a powerful strategy I began using lately and it works nearly all the time for me.

Give Your Toddler a Choice Within Your Choice
Kids, in general, get frustrated when they feel like they have no control over their little lives. I used to lose my mind trying to win the battle with Ryan. Whenever I would tell him to do something the contest would begin. I could ask politely, I could ask firmly, I could order and I could even yell. Nothing helped. In fact, the more I insisted that he do something the more stubborn and adamant he would be in resisting me. Then, I started giving Ryan choices that each served my disciplinary goal. When Ryan throws his sippy cup on the floor, instead of starting the battle of wills, I give him a choice by politely asking:

Situation: It never fails, when we’re on vacation, the rains hit. We’re all stuck in the hotel room, and inevitably everyone gets grumpy. How do we keep the kids happy if this disaster strikes again?

Think about it: To quote the insightful words of William Shakespeare, “Nothing is good or bad, only thinking makes it so.” Hey, you’re still on vacation, no one has to go to work, or go to school, and you don’t have to cook and clean. You can still find plenty of ways to enjoy the time.

Solution #1: If you read this book before you left, you’ve packed some indoor activities. If not, venture out to a local store, and buy a selection. It will be the best money you spend on the trip. A few ideas are: paint by number sets, Legos TM, balloons, head sets with music and books on tape, puzzles, clay, and hand-held computer games. One toy that’s a hit for many kids from about age three to ten is a selection of plastic miniature animals or bugs. Many kids will play happily with these for hours. There are many favorite games that are made in small travel size versions, such as checkers, chess and even Monopoly TM. Check out the local toy store.

Solution #2: If you’re lucky enough to have a kitchenette in your room, allow the kids to play house. Let them use the dishes and supplies. Cleaning up the mess is worth it, since this activity will keep them busy for long periods of time. Even better, let room service take care of the mess and give them an extra tip.

Solution #3: Let the kids build a fort using tables, chairs, blankets and whatever else they can find. Let them play, eat, and even sleep in the fort. Need I say it again? The mess is worth the hours of happy playtime.

Solution #4: Fill the bathtub with water. Toss in anything you can find that can be used as water toys, such as cups, plastic dishes, and empty shampoo bottles. Let the kids enjoy playing in the water and don’t worry about the splashing.

Solution #5: Play “Easter Egg Hunt” using coins. Hide them all over the rooms and let the kids find them. Have a scavenger hunt, or a treasure hunt.

Solution #6: Set up a beauty salon. Let the kids practice hairstyles, paint each other’s fingernails, and put on make up.

Solution #7: Let the kids play dress-up with your clothes, if you’re comfortable with the idea. Have a fashion show. Put on a play. Have a concert.

Solution #8: Let them play in the rain! Just dry them off and give them some hot chocolate when they come in.

About the Author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.