Pregnancy is an amazing time for all family members. There are many new experiences and emotions that will be shared and experienced. All too often our canine family members are not included. Many families believe it best that they re-home their dog due to the changes and not knowing how to manage it all. Many families have concerns about safety. It is rare that a dog can not stay safely in its current home after the arrival of a baby. There are many proactive steps that can be taken ahead of time to help things go smoothly. Obedience, leadership as well as management are all essential to providing a safe and comfortable environment for all.

It is strongly recommended that you attend an obedience class regardless of the age of the dog. Obedience encourages bonding, self control and mental stimulation. Shop around and find a program that fits your goals and needs. I recommend you start by gathering information about dog trainers in your area. A helpful website is The Association of Pet Dog Trainers. (www.apdt.com). Here you will obtain much information and will know a bit more of what to look for in regards to a training and manners program. There are many wonderful trainers. Take your time and select the one that listens and understands your family goals.

Leadership is essential to our canine companions. It is important that your dog knows he can trust you to be the “leader.” When you bring a dog into your family you become their pack. The leader of the pack communicates a sense of safety and trust that makes it clear to the dog that things are under control. It is important that the dog knows that his leader is capable of handling this role or the dog may decide to take charge himself. Many times confusion about leadership roles can lead to undesirable behavior and sometimes injury.

Leaders: Have control of the resources the dogs need, crave and enjoy. Asking your dog to sit, down, perform several commands will help communicate you are the leader. Here are some examples of ways you can be a leader.

1. Decide when you want to feed your dog, not allowing them to “control” this by barking, nudging or any other demanding behavior.
2. Having your dog/s sit and wait for a release command before entering or exiting your home.
3. Having your dog walk close to you allows you to monitor the environment and keeps your dog close in case of a passer by, loose dog, running child or any other potential situation.
4. Ignore demanding behavior for your attention such as pawing, nudging, whining.
5. Keep playtime fun but under control. Your ability to regain your dogs attention when excited is very important and a great demonstration of leadership.
6. Demonstrate overall confidence in expectations.
7. After being away, calmly return to the pack without a fuss or huge greeting celebration.

If you are having issues with your dog you may want to consider how leadership is represented in your home. This combined with obedience can lead to a successful and harmonious relationship. If you feel that you may be having issues regarding leadership in your home, I suggest you contact a canine behavior consultant or trainer prior to the arrival of your baby. If you have experienced aggressive behavior with your dog please consult your vet. You may need to seek the help of a behaviorist in your area. Your vet can help guide you in the right direction. Many dogs respond extremely well with obedience and leadership well established. There may still be times however that management is necessary for all.

Management may still be necessary with your dog. There will be many visitors and lots of commotion during the time of the baby’s birth. If you have a dog that is fearful of guests and you have people over, you may choose to “manage” the situation and remove the dog to a quiet secure space where he feels safe. Setting our dogs up for success is key. Allowing them to practice a negative behavior is reinforcing that behavior. There are times that crating and removing the dog may be temporarily a better solution instead of risking a negative consequence or a chance to practice unwanted behavior. If you choose to crate the dog please keep in mind that this is not punishment. It is allowing a safe place for your dog. Reinforce this by providing a special treat for them each time they are in their crate. Stuffing a toy with peanut butter and kibble is one idea. There are many ways to make this a positive and welcoming den for your dog.

It has been our experience that with leadership, obedience and management, canine family members welcome the arrival of a baby with wagging tails! After all, their leaders are happy so they should be too! Congratulations and enjoy!

Family Paws encourages you to never leave an infant or child unsupervised with a dog or puppy! Even good dogs have tolerance limits. Expecting a child and dog to “work it out” is not realistic and can be extremely dangerous! Always be aware of the interaction between your child and any dog. Any dog no matter their breed, color, size, age and past experiences can lead to an amazingly great outcome or potentially dangerous outcome. Your involvement and instincts play an important role!

For More information please contact Jennifer Shryock at jen@familypaws.com or visit http://www.familypaws.com to learn more!

Last week I attended a presentation from Parenting Expert and well-known author, Stephen Biddulph on “Raising Boys”. As I have an 11 year old son, I was interested to hear what Stephen had to say. In fact, so were the other 800 other parents in the room!

The key point that I picked up on was that boys from the age of 6 -14 really need ‘time’ with their dads. That is the most influential period in their lives when they bond with him. And the type of time they need is not all thrown into a once a week or month block or some exotic holiday once a year, they need to spend time with their sons on a regular basis. Otherwise how can you build a strong and stable relationship?

For the single mums reading this, don’t despair. If you are estranged from your partner and bringing up your son is your responsibility, having a positive male role model in his life ie. uncle, brother, grandfather teacher, tennis coach etc. will work as well.

What’s happening in our society in the chase for the almighty dollar and in many instances the big ego, our relationships are breaking down. People are totally dominated by their work and have little energy to invest in themselves and their families.

Planning Personal Time
It’s very interesting to note that every client I have coached … male or female, whether they are the business owner, director, executive or whatever title they hold, all have the same common goal… they want more time for their personal life.

They do not want to start work at 7.30 a.m. and return home at 7.00 p.m. They are committed and enjoy what they do, however they are not prepared to sacrifice their own relationships and wellbeing anymore. THE PRICE IS NOT WORTH IT!

You Can Turn Your Life Around
And do you know what the three key things you need to do to turn your life around? Learn to say ‘no’, how to manage your time and then take action.

That’s right. Everyone tells you how busy and how little time they have, yet most people do nothing to learn the skills that will have a dramatic impact on their work and personal lives.

You have to plan time to get things done. Do you want to spend more time with your family? Do you know how to plan for it? How much time do you spend working? How much time do you invest in yourself to learn how to be more effective? Are you hoping that one day, work will ease off and then you can spend more time with your family? Do you really need a bigger house, nicer car or overseas holiday? Will that improve your relationships? Do you think that you’ll (hopefully) stumble on the secrets to getting more time back in your life? If that’s the way you live your life, your kids will probably be all grown up and not really need you.

Cats in the Cradle
For those of you old enough to remember, Cat Stevens recorded a song called “Cats in the Cradle”. It was about a young boy whose Dad was always busy working. He never seemed to be available when his son wanted to be with him. Over the years this continued until the boy became an adult. By then his Dad had retired and had time on his hands, however his son had now become too busy to see his Dad. He too was working and had kids. The tables had turned. All of a sudden the Dad realised what he had done. He was too busy caught up in his work and missed out on his son growing up.

The Final Word
For those of you who have managed to maintain a good balance in your life, congratulations. No doubt you are happier, healthier and more fulfilled. For the rest of you who are unhappy, unhealthy and unfulfilled, then you need to take action if you are serious about wanting to make changes. Do it, because nothing changes if nothing changes!

Have a great week!

Lorraine Pirihi

PS: I highly recommend you invest in Stephen Biddulph’s best-selling book “Manhood”. A must for men and women.

It’s available from major bookstores.

About The Author
Lorraine Pirihi is Australia’s Personal Productivity Specialist, Leading Life Coach and a dynamic presenter. She runs her own business The Office Organiser specialising in working with Small Business Owners and Managers helping them to dramatically improve their productivity, reduce the stress and the mess and have more time for living life! With a Bachelor of Experience, a PHD in Commonsense and a Masters in Results, Lorraine is Australia’s expert on how to get organized at work so you can have a life too! Book Lorraine today for your next event. It will be the best investment of your time and money you ever make! Tel: (+613)9532 5497 lorraine@office-organiser.com.au