Family meetings provide opportunities for feelings to be aired and validated. They also allow younger children to feel they are an important part of the decision-making process when it comes to family vacations and other major and minor family functions.

Before the first meeting commences, set a few ground rules such as:

• Speak in a calm tone.
• Avoid name-calling, finger-pointing, and sarcasm.
• Turn off the TV, radio and telephones.
• Allow each person to voice his or her concerns and ideas.
• Listen to all opinions before making a decision.
• If a person voices a complaint, they must also bring to the table at least one possible remedy to the situation.

Locations for future family meetings may also be brainstormed at the first meeting. Here are a few examples:

Circle Time
Very simply, sit on the floor together, in a circle. Designate an object as a “talking token”. This can be a small stuffed animal, a necklace to be worn, a hat, or any other item that will be passed around. Whoever holds the talking token may speak. Once they are finished, they must pass the token to the next person.

Restaurant Rendezvous
Take turns choosing a favorite restaurant to host your family meetings. For this option, choose an afternoon or evening in the middle of the week, or at off-peak times, to avoid heavy crowds. End the meeting before dessert arrives, so everyone can indulge their sweet tooth happily.

Hobby Haven
I know of several families who hold their meetings at places that cater to their favorite hobbies. For instance, one family conducts their meeting at a bowling alley. Once the meeting is over, they enjoy bowling together. Another family combines their gathering with their love of books, by meeting at a café in their favorite bookstore. And yet another family I know holds their weekly meeting after a joyful round of put-put golf. This option combines family communication and fun.

However, and wherever, your family decides to host the meetings, remember this all-important point: Always end each meeting with a hug!

About The Author
Deborah Shelton is a mother, freelance writer, and author of the brand new book, The Five Minute Parent: Fun & Fast Activities for You and Your Little Ones. Visit Deborah’s website for more family-friendly ideas: www.fiveminuteparent.com.
deborah@fiveminuteparent.com

International Parenting Commitment Day, March 20th is fast approaching. What do you have planned to celebrate this special day? Are you ready to commit or recommit to the sacred and important role of parenting so you can uplift, encourage, and inspire your children to become responsible, caring, confident people?

Please consider joining with millions of parents around the world who are making a commitment to parent with purpose. To celebrate International Parenting Commitment Day with your family consider implementing one of the following celebrations/rituals.

Commitment Celebrations

Pledge night
Convene a family meeting. Propose that the family design a pledge that reflects your belief that feelings of oneness and a sense of belonging are important in your family. Include the importance of placing family first, honoring each other’s uniqueness, and the security of family structure somewhere in your pledge. Allow all family members to have input by inviting suggestions and reaching a mutual consensus on the pledge. Display your pledge prominently in your home.

Principles of work
Create a poster to display at you work site. Include beliefs you have about how you want to “BE” during your work time. Include items such as treat others with respect, listen to other’s ideas, encourage others, and keep confidences private. Put at least 10 items on your Principles of Work. At the top add, SUCCEED AT HOME FIRST. Share your work principles with your family.

Goal setting evening
After your children are in bed for the evening, set some family goals with you spouse. Pick two or three to focus on for the upcoming year. With each goal you choose, list activities you can do that will help you move in the direction of accomplishing it.

Example:
Goal: Use self-responsible language with our children.
Activities:

1. Eliminate the words “Makes me” from our language patterns. Change “You make me mad,” to “I am feeling angry about this.”
2. Use the words “choose/decide/pick” over and over with our children. We will say, “I see you chose to help your brother,” and “If you choose to throw the toy you will be choosing to give it a rest on the shelf for awhile.”
3. We will stop “shoulding” on our children. We intend to replace our “shoulds” with “coulds.”

Balloon release
Buy two helium filled balloons. Write several parenting concerns on file cards that have troubled you recently. Also fill file cards with parenting stressors, situations that you create stress around with your children (loud radios, poor table manners, etc). Attach the cards to the balloon strings. Go outside, say a prayer asking God to take your stress and concerns and handle it in a way that achieves the greatest good for all concerned. Communicate your desire to be free of stress. Take a few deep breaths. Release the balloon, you concerns, and your stress into the air. Watch as the balloons carry your problems away. Feel lighter after having let go of all that stress.

Warm-fuzzy clothesline
A warm-fuzzy is a compliment (written or verbal) that is given to another person. Why not begin a warm-fuzzy clothesline in you home? Have each family member decorate clothes pins in their own image and write their names on them. Hang them on a clothesline that you place in a prominent spot in your home (kitchen or den wall). Use the clothespins as mini-mailboxes to share notes of encouragement, affirmation and praise with one another. Model this technique by sending at least one a day yourself.

Use this special day, March 20, to re-connect with your children by celebrating your mutual caring using one of the rituals above. When you do you will be demonstrating the importance you place on the sacred role of parenting. Enjoy.

About the Author
Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of The 10 Commitments: Parenting with Purpose.They also publish a FREE email newsletter for parents. Subscribe to it at ipp57@aol.com. Visit www.chickmoorman.com, www.thomashaller.com, and www.10commitments.net.

Are your mornings rushed, chaotic and disorganized? Then it’s time to get control and make morning a good start to a wonderful day! When your morning activities run smoothly, and you’re out the door on time it can make your whole day feel better. To create a peaceful morning routine, follow these steps:

Start your morning — at night!
A real key to smoothing out your morning is to prepare as much as you can the night before. This means choosing the day’s clothing, packing lunches, gathering homework, signing permission slips and setting the table for breakfast.

Post a calendar
Buy the biggest wall calendar you can find and hang it in a central location. Write down events and appointments for everyone. Use different color marking pens to code items for easy reading. (As an example: ball practice in red, carpool in green, doctors/dentists in purple) Keep the calendar up to date and you’ll be more organized!

Create a drop box
Have a labeled box for each family member by the door. Use this to store shoes, keys, backpacks, coats and anything else that goes out the door with you in the morning. Plastic tubs or decorated crates make great drop boxes!

Use a morning list
Sit down and analyze a typical morning. Make a list of everything that needs to be done. Create a poster-sized list of the standard morning activities listed in order to be done:

If you have a child who gets easily distracted and ignores the morning chart – don’t give up! Just make a small mini- size chart, laminate it, put it on a chain and let your child wear it as his “morning necklace”! Your part is to make a few gentle reminders, “How are you doing on your chart this morning?”

Check out sleep time
If your child has trouble getting up in the morning and sticking to his schedule take a look at what time he or she goes to bed. Without adequate sleep a child won’t be able to follow a morning routine successfully.

Fix problems with a family meeting
If problems persist take the time to sit down with your children and talk about it. Let everyone have a turn talking, and then work to arrive at solutions that will benefit everyone.

Get up fifteen minutes earlier
You’d be amazed at the difference fifteen minutes can make to your morning, it can mean a peaceful pace instead of a rushed frenzy. Try it!

Praise successes
Remember, your words of praise will encourage your children to continue to meet their goals!

Copyright Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)

About the author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.