Name: Sandy Frinton
Age: 32
Hometown: Poughkeepsie, New York
How far along: 28 weeks
Favorite look: Jeans

I’m a preppy, classic dresser, and I typically wear clothes from the Gap, Eddie Bauer, and L.L. Bean. My husband likes me to wear the kinds of things I always wear. He doesn’t like “pregnancy clothes.” I don’t think he’s used to my new body.

My favorite maternity clothes are my husband’s old Levi’s jeans from college. I found a bunch of them when we were cleaning one day. They’re in all different sizes so I can grow into some of them. His big jeans were a great find because I’m still too small for maternity jeans. His Levi’s are baggy, long, and so comfortable. You can’t beat the fact that they were free. I don’t want to invest money in clothes until I’m skinny again.

People say that I look cute in his jeans and I like that I don’t look as big to the outside world as I really am. I top the jeans with his old oxford shirts—white, pink, yellow, and pinstriped. I just throw them in the washer and dryer and roll up the sleeves. With his clothes, I’m sporting bigger sizes, but I feel confident knowing I’ve kept my style.

Name: Jill Holder
Age: 33
Hometown: Brooklyn, New York
How far along: 36 weeks
Favorite look: Power suit

I’m very short, so I’m conscious about looking round and stocky. I like to wear clothes that give me a shape. Most maternity clothes are “tenty,” like smocks and baby doll dresses. I just can’t do the look where clothes balloon out over the belly.

So my best find has been the business suit I bought for less than $50. It’s charcoal gray and has pants, a skirt, and a jacket with a zipper down the front and two pockets on each breast. The jacket also has a clip so I can taper it in the back. I like that I can switch off between the skirt and the pants. Everything is made out of cotton jersey, so it’s comfortable and machine washable.

I spice up the suit with a pair of black leather mules. It’s easy to forget I’m pregnant because I look so chic in the outfit. I can walk into a meeting and be taken seriously. One guy at work didn’t even know I was pregnant. When I wear bulky maternity clothes, people just look at my belly. When I wear my suit, people look at my face.

Name: Angie Tucker
Age: 29
Hometown: Garden Grove, California
How far along: 26 weeks
Favorite look: Stretchy separates

It’s difficult to find stylish clothes that I’d wear if I weren’t pregnant. It’s bad enough that you gain weight, yet don’t look pregnant until the fifth or sixth month—the last thing you want to do is wear dorky clothes.

I’m normally thin and big-busted with an hourglass shape. I like to dress sexy and wear fitted fashions, and pregnancy is no exception. My favorite look is a long, black stretch polyester-blend skirt with a black short-sleeve top. The top was $14 and the skirt was $20. The shirt is stretchy and snug. It shows off my belly and has a scoop neck that looks great, especially when I wear a little choker necklace. The skirt has a drawstring waist so I can roll over the top to make it shorter if I want. I wear black slides to show my toes. I get a lot of compliments when I wear my sexy outfit. It’s nice to know I can be pregnant and keep my personal style

Name: Jadie Gamble
Age: 38
Hometown: Atlanta
How far along: 31 weeks
Favorite look: Bathing suit

I’m kind of chubby, and I got bigger sooner than other women. When I was six months pregnant, I probably looked like I was at eight months. I’m really big now and people ask me if I’m having twins. But I’m not worried about the weight gain—I think I look pretty good all around. In fact, I like showing off my pregnancy.

I bought a great black one-piece swimsuit with spaghetti straps for $35. It has a skirt that makes my thighs look nice, and its scoop neck shows off my cleavage. The other day I felt so good in it, I pranced around the pool.

I actually feel more confident in a bathing suit when I’m pregnant than I do when I’m not expecting. In a bathing suit, people definitely can see that I’m pregnant. My husband likes when I show some skin, too. He says I look like a really cute pregnant chick.

About the Author
Julie Weingarden is a writer based in Royal Oak, Michigan. Copyright © 1999-2002 ClubMom, Inc. All rights reserved.

Family meetings provide opportunities for feelings to be aired and validated. They also allow younger children to feel they are an important part of the decision-making process when it comes to family vacations and other major and minor family functions.

Before the first meeting commences, set a few ground rules such as:

• Speak in a calm tone.
• Avoid name-calling, finger-pointing, and sarcasm.
• Turn off the TV, radio and telephones.
• Allow each person to voice his or her concerns and ideas.
• Listen to all opinions before making a decision.
• If a person voices a complaint, they must also bring to the table at least one possible remedy to the situation.

Locations for future family meetings may also be brainstormed at the first meeting. Here are a few examples:

Circle Time
Very simply, sit on the floor together, in a circle. Designate an object as a “talking token”. This can be a small stuffed animal, a necklace to be worn, a hat, or any other item that will be passed around. Whoever holds the talking token may speak. Once they are finished, they must pass the token to the next person.

Restaurant Rendezvous
Take turns choosing a favorite restaurant to host your family meetings. For this option, choose an afternoon or evening in the middle of the week, or at off-peak times, to avoid heavy crowds. End the meeting before dessert arrives, so everyone can indulge their sweet tooth happily.

Hobby Haven
I know of several families who hold their meetings at places that cater to their favorite hobbies. For instance, one family conducts their meeting at a bowling alley. Once the meeting is over, they enjoy bowling together. Another family combines their gathering with their love of books, by meeting at a café in their favorite bookstore. And yet another family I know holds their weekly meeting after a joyful round of put-put golf. This option combines family communication and fun.

However, and wherever, your family decides to host the meetings, remember this all-important point: Always end each meeting with a hug!

About The Author
Deborah Shelton is a mother, freelance writer, and author of the brand new book, The Five Minute Parent: Fun & Fast Activities for You and Your Little Ones. Visit Deborah’s website for more family-friendly ideas: www.fiveminuteparent.com.
deborah@fiveminuteparent.com

The old saying “babies aren’t born with instruction manuals” has opened the door for unwanted advice from family and friends, alike. If you’re a mother, specifically a “new” mother, at first you may appreciate the guidance of those that went before you. But eventually even the most patient of women will break. You will most likely become a hermit, hiding the car in the garage, locking the doors, turning the ringer off and avoiding anyone that perceives themselves as an “expert” on the subject of motherhood and newborns. So before you become a recluse and start avoiding all human contact; here’s some more advice on “unwanted” advice.

Often times, a new mother’s insecurities get the best of her, and in all honesty, this happens to all mothers; not just the “new” ones. As mothers, we’re always questioning our abilities to raise our children. You want the best for them and fear you’ll make bad choices, its human nature. Therefore, when someone offers advice or guidance, we often take their words as criticism. But in all reality, most family and friends mean to help, not judge. Open your mind to their words; ignore the little voice inside your head that says they’re judging you. In most instances, these same people have been giving you “unwanted” advice for years and you’ve never paid any attention to it. The insecurities of having a newborn often times warrants defensive behaviors when faced with unwanted advice. However, motherhood is a learning experience; it starts at the birth and never ends. Listening to family and friends that have walked in your shoes before can, however, be a soothing and rewarding experience.

Everyone will have opinions on certain circumstances and if you listen closely, even theirs will differ from one another. Pretty soon, you find yourself throwing your hands up and surrendering like General Lee. However, often times by educating yourself on what the actual “experts” say can eliminate the frustration and the insecurities that a new mom will face. Educating yourself on the best choices that you can make for your newborn can build self-confidence, self-respect, and sanity.

It is very important for mother’s to have a good relationship with their infant’s pediatrician, as well. Often times, the trust you put into your child’s doctor will help fight off those insecurities that you may have. A pediatrician sees most infants several times during the first few months of their lives. These are great opportunities for mother’s to ask questions. Keep a notebook handy, write down concerns that you have, or questions.

Lighthearted advice is just that, when given it’s meant to be taken as helpful hints and suggestions. However, in some instances, you will have family and friends insisting on “their way” of doing things. When this circumstance occurs, be prepared. Thank the person and tell them you will consider their advice, quote what you have read from child-rearing books, explain to them that you and your child’s pediatrician has discussed the matter and you’re following doctors orders. If all else fails, change the subject or leave the room.

In many circumstances, especially those that are short-term, you may consider following the person’s advice while they are present. In all reality, they will leave and when they do, so can their advice. Short-term circumstances that have no long-term effects are just that. They won’t warp or change the big picture. If your mother-in-law comes to your house to “help”, and suggests adding more blankets to the crib or turning the heat up because the baby looks cold, just go with it. When she does leave, you can quickly undo the heartfelt actions.

Often times, you may find yourself in a circumstance where all other methods of deterring an opinion or advice have failed. You have tried avoiding the subject, quoting a doctor or expert, and even ignoring the advice. But yet still, the person insists on you listening to them. It is at this time that you have to result to what I call, “the truth”. In the kindest fashion possible, you explain to them your honest feelings on the subject, you express gratitude that they care, but in all honesty, the child is yours and you know what’s best. If you’re uncomfortable saying this to someone; ask a friend, your husband, or another family member to talk to the person and explain to them your true feelings on the situation.

It’s important to surround yourself with positive people. If possible, find other mother’s that share your views and values. Then, as mother’s you can swap stories, not advice.

About The Author
Dr. James Brann is a board certified Obstetrician and Gynecologist and a Fellow of the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. He is also the Editor of Women’s Healthcare Topics an information source for all women.