This is only the start—you’ll receive presents after the baby is born, too. From there, it doesn’t end: baptism, birthdays, holidays. I do believe in sending thank you notes for every occasion and teaching children to do the same from a young age.

My nephews send thank you notes to us without fail for every occasion that we give them a gift, and those cards receive places of honor on our refrigerator. It’s been fun to watch them evolve from notes written by their mom, to the simple words “thank you” in big blocky letters they wrote themselves as kindergarteners, to the personalized, heartfelt notes they now send as young adults.

Thank yous are important, but I digress. Some etiquette experts say you have as long as six months after an event to send thank you notes. The rule of thumb I’ve always adhered to is two months. Unless you have 1,000 people at your gala event, there’s really no reason to take six months to send a thank you note.

But do yourself a favor and get those baby shower thank you notes out as soon as possible, so you don’t create a backlog and find yourself with a long list of cards to write and a crying infant in the other room. If at all possible, get your shower “thank yous” out before the baby is born.

It all begins with the list. If you send Christmas cards every year, you probably already have all your important family addresses well-organized. If not, you may have put together an address list for your shower—or whoever hosted the shower did it for you, in secrecy. Get that list! It will make your life so much easier and keep you from having to re-invent the wheel.

Our article about Baby Shower Ideas recommends having each guest fill in their own name and address on thank you card envelopes as they leave, which is certainly a great idea if the host of the shower thinks to provide thank you cards for the mom-to-be in advance. (And what a thoughtful idea!)

With your address list in hand, you’ll also need the list of gifts you received and who gave them to you. Hopefully, one of your friends at the shower wrote all this information down as you opened presents and everyone ooh-ed and ahh-ed over the adorable onesies and baby blankets.

And, of course, you need thank you cards! For round-two of gift-giving, after the baby is born, you may want to have cards printed with the baby’s picture on it or simply include a wallet-size photo with the card. If the baby isn’t born yet, it might be fun to include a sonogram picture (especially if you have one from a 3D sonogram), but there are also a wide variety of adorable thank you cards to choose from with no baby pictures required, online or at your local store.

Some Web sites and even drug stores will allow you to include your own special message pre-printed on the cards, but this is not enough! Each card should include a personalized, handwritten message, too, along with the gift-giver’s name, and your personal, handwritten signature. Visit the Tiny Prints Store for a great selection of Thank You Cards that you personalize or buy as-is!

The writing… for many people, that’s the hard part. What do you say? The important thing is to be heartfelt and personal. Mention the gift by name, and possibly even the way it will be used or something you especially like about it. “Thank you so much for the adorable outfit. It is my favorite color, and Ashley will be wearing it when we come home from the hospital together!”

If you know the baby’s name, it’s fine to use it, even if the baby isn’t born yet. Don’t forget to sign the card from both yourself and your husband, even if the shower was thrown in your honor. If you feel weird signing a card from an unborn baby, you can definitely skip that, but some mothers think it’s a cute touch.

In addition to commenting personally and positively on the gift, be sure to thank the person for attending the celebration, as well. Let them know you appreciated their presence, not just their present!

What if a gift is positively awful and you plan on heading right back to the store to make an exchange? (Or they didn’t check your registry and you received a duplicate.) Find something nice to say, but don’t be phony. Let the person know you appreciate the thoughtful gift, and emphasize how nice it was to see them at the shower. If you received two of the same item, comment on each as if it were the only one you received; the gift-giver doesn’t have to know whose Diaper Genie went back to the store and which one is sitting in the nursery right now.

Finally, be sure to send an extra special card, and maybe even a small gift, such as a box of chocolates or a scented candle, to the host or hosts of the shower. Let them know you appreciate how much work goes into planning such an event, and how much it meant to you. Don’t forget to thank them for their gift, as well!

Writing thank you cards is not difficult or scary and, in fact, it should give you a warm feeling inside, as you reminisce about the good times you had at your shower and all the love (and presents) you received! You don’t have to be Shakespeare or Miss Manners to write a good thank you card. Take time to truly appreciate the thought, expense, attention and care that went into each gift, and this gratitude will be reflected in every word you write.

It’s been raining for a week and the kids and bored and restless. How do you cure those rainy day blahs? Try some of these parent tested and kid approved ideas and your children will be hoping for another rainy day when the sun finally peaks through.

1. Share a book. Pick an action packed, funny book and take turns reading aloud. Some great choices are My Brother Louis Measures Worms : And Other Louis Stories by Barbara Robinson, The Great Brain by John Fitzgerald or Amelia Bedelia by Peggy Parrish. For more great reads, check with your local library. Your librarian should have reading lists available.

2. Put on a play. Your children can write their own play and act it out or make paper bag puppets for additional fun. A great book for quick and easy skit ideas is The Skit Book: 101 Skits from Kids by Margaret Read MacDonald.

3. Go on an indoor picnic. Put out a blanket and pack a basket full of goodies. For a quick but special picnic lunch, jazz up ordinary sandwiches with cookie cutters in animal shapes.

4. Hold rainy day Olympics. Make the events things that can be done in the house, such as standing on one leg or seeing who can make his bed the fastest. Give the winners chocolate coins instead of medals.

5. Learn a new craft or hobby. Check your local library for instructional videos that will tell you how to knit, crochet or paint and buy enough supplies for everyone to give it a try. If you decide to learn to knit or crochet, your children can make scarves or blankets to donate to a local shelter.

6. Hold a fancy dress party. Put together a trunk of old cocktail dresses, suits, fancy hats, and costume jewelry. Have everyone dress up and give prizes for the most creative and fancy costumes.

7. Go on safari. Make an indoor tent by draping a blanket over a table or several chairs. Serve trail mix as a snack and provide binoculars for hunting wild animals. Then pull up a cushion and read Maurice Sendek’s Where the Wild Things Are or play a video or DVD about wild baby animals.

8. Get ready for a yard sale. Work with your children to clean out the attic, garage and bedrooms. Clean and price all the items and box them up by category so that you can quickly set up your sale on the next sunny weekend.

9. Have an indoor market. Buy snacks, activities, and other inexpensive items and set up a store table for each child. Provide market baskets and spare change so they can buy from each other and make sure you stop by the shops, too. For additional fun, let them keep their profits to restock their shops for the next rainy day.

10. Make portrait cookies. Buy a sugar cookie mix, a gingerbread cookie cutter, colored icing and sprinkles. Roll out the sugar cookies and help the kids cut out their people and then let them decorate the gingerbread men to look like themselves, friends and family. For additional fun, find dog or cat cookie cutters so your children can include the family pet.

About the Author
Katelyn Thomas is the editor of Cecil Child, an online parenting magazine filled with parenting articles and kids’ stories and games, as well as local resources for Cecil County residents. Visit Cecil Child at http://cecilchild.com for more family fun.

Age 1: Invite only family members and close friends only because this birthday is more for the parents than for the child. At age 1, a child doesn’t understand the concept of “Birthday Party.” He or she is getting a lot of attention—which is all a 1-year-old wants or understands anyway. You should not go overboard on presents because too much could scare or confuse a child. You should consider getting specialty items such as a plate that says “First Birthday,” a 1-year-old candle, and possible a table cover that everyone could sign with fabric paint to have as keepsakes that can someday be shown (or given to) to your grown child.

Age 2: 2-years-olds should have one or two playmates over for a small Birthday Play Day. Again I suggest you keep a birthday plate and other keepsakes for your 2-year-old.

Age 3: 3-year-olds should have three to four playmates over, and at this age you might have try a birthday game such as “Who can stack the blocks the highest?” I do not recommend having a clown or playing any games that require a blindfold over a child’s eyes such key due to the fact either can scare children at this age. Remember your child has just turned 3, and the playmates are around that age. They are still not able to understand fully structured games very well. They only know if they do something good or better than other children, everyone will give them attention. Again I suggest you collect keepsakes.

Age 4: At 4, children should now be ready for a “real” party. I suggest four or five playmates. 4-year-olds are ready now for party decorations, but I suggest you do less and save your money for the big number “5” birthday (or buy decorations that you can put away and use again). Games such as Musical Chairs, and carrying a hard boiled egg on a spoon to the finish line without dropping it relay race can be appropriate, but remember that games will be played and finished much sooner than you think. Consider having a few of your child’s favorite videos on hand. Even if the kids have seen them 100 times, they will enjoy them. After an hour or so, you will probably need a break and the children might be cranky. A movie they are all spellbound by will be a great way to relax the kids and you. You might want to consider spreading a couple of blankets on the floor and have some pillows handy for sleepyheads!

Age 5: 5-year-olds should have a big party, but remind them that this is because they are the big “5,” and either starting school or just in school, and having a “big” party will not happen every year. Explain to them that big parties are only for special birthdays such as 5 because they have started or are starting school, 10 because that is the first double-digit number, and of course 16 (“Sweet 16” for girls and “Driving Age” for boys). This will save you money in the long run. On the fifth birthday, I suggest you first decide if you want to do it yourself, rent a building or park area but still do it yourself, or call local businesses (like McDonalds) to see what party-planning packages they offer. I personally suggest renting a park area if weather permits because the kids will be just as happy playing on park equipment as they would if you spent a ton of money on a professionally planned party. Have several inexpensive disposable cameras on hand and let your Birthday Boy or Girl take pictures of his or her first “big” party!

Great games for 5-year-olds whether inside or outside are:

Too often we forgo entertaining because of the mere thought of all of the preparation that is involved. And more is not better. Often we try to out do each other with lavish parties and expensive gifts. Stop and remember for a second what was important from your own childhood. Was it an outing? Baking cookies with your grandmother? Building a snowman with your dad? We need to connect. This doesn’t require more time, just shifting the focus of the time we already have. Here, a casual party and a very simple activity were the catalyst that brought everyone together.

To get the entire neighborhood into the Christmas spirit we planned a caroling party.

The day before our guests arrived, my kids and I spent an afternoon making decorative candleholders to give to each caroler, to light the way for our caroling expedition.

Dad, dressed as Santa, provided our very own photo opportunity. Little ones whispered their Christmas list in Santa’s ear. Grown ups, as well as kids, had their pictures taken in Santa’s lap.

Adults, kids, and even a few dogs then joined us on our merry way. Our numbers grew as we made our way caroling through the neighborhood.

As the carolers returned, we welcomed them with Mexican hot chocolate and ginger spice cookies. This party was a great way to engage everyone in an activity that the whole family could enjoy. And for a few short hours we were able to turn our attention away from the commercial marketing of the holidays to something much more personal.

Recipe: Mexican Hot Chocolate
Recipes are one of our most cherished traditions. Passed down from one generation to the next, they conjure up memories of holiday preparations or time spent with a favorite relative. Cooking provides a quiet time to pass on the wisdom of family lore.

Ingredients:
4 cups whole milk
4 ounces Mexican chocolate such as Ibarra

or

3 1/2 ounces semi-sweet chocolate plus 1 teaspoon cinnamon
4 tablespoons sugar
Pinch of salt
1 teaspoon vanilla, preferably Mexican
2 eggs

1. In a medium sized saucepan, heat the milk over medium heat until scalding.
2. Break the chocolate into pieces. Add to the hot milk along with the sugar and salt. Stir until melted. Beat with a wire whisk until frothy.
3. Add the eggs and vanilla. Continue to whisk.
4. Pour into 4 mugs. Garnish with a cinnamon stick.

About The Author
Rondi Hillstrom Davis and Janell Sewall Oakes are the co-authors of the award-winning book Together: Creating Family Traditions. To check out their website that’s jam packed with family ideas, visit www.togetherparenting.com. To subscribe to their online newsletter, go to www.togetherparenting.com/feedback.asp. info@togetherparenting.com

When your child moves from crib to bed it’s a milestone in his life as well as yours. There is no precise time for making this move, though typically it’s between the first and third birthday. The key to success is to be patient and allow your child time to adjust to the change.

Why move a child from crib to bed?
If a child sleeps well in his crib, don’t rush the change. Switching to a bed gives a child freedom and brings new issues for parents, such as the yo-yo syndrome or early morning wanderings. The most common reasons to switch:

• Your child learns how to climb.
  — Move your child out of the crib when the rail is up to the level of his nipples, since climbing out is more possible.
• Your child outgrows the crib.
  — Don’t assume it’s time! You may think that he’s uncomfortable, but he may be content in his little nest.
• Your child asks for a bed.
  — If she’s old enough, then go ahead and take the leap.
• Your child is learning how to use the toilet.
  — Even if your child uses the toilet during the day, it’s often a long while before bedtime dryness happens.
• A new sibling is on the way.
  — If your little one loves his crib, then ousting him to make room for the newcomer may add stress. If you feel that the time is right then make the change two months or more before your newborn arrives.

What kind of bed should my child move to?
There are a number of options for a child’s first bed:

• Toddler bed
  These are small, low and child-sized. They have guard rails on all sides, and come in playful designs.
• Regular bed
  A common choice is a mattress, box springs and bed frame (with all sides protected from fall-outs). Consider a double or bigger size to accommodate the night-reading ritual.
• Mattress on the floor
  A popular choice is a mattress or futon on the floor. This provides your little one with a big-kid bed, but one that prevents any painful falls.
• Bunk bed
  Hold off on a bunk bed until your child is 6 years old, when it is considered safe.

How do we make the change?
Which approach is best for you will depend on your reasons for making the change, your child’s personality, and the size of his room. Here are a few options:

• Big-kid bed hoopla
  Some children enjoy having an official Big Kid Day party. Set up the bed, decorate the room and add a few sleep-related gifts like books and stuffed animals.
• One-step-at-a-time
  Take the mattress out of the crib and place it on the floor in the place as the crib was. This gives your child the same sleeping surface and view of the room as he’s accustomed to. Place guard rails around the sides to create a crib-like enclosure. Keep the same bedding and crib toys. This is a mid-step between the crib and a real bed.
• The gradual introduction
  Set up the new bed in the same room with the crib. Allow your child to play on the bed and nap there. Do your bedtime reading in the new bed. This will help your child get used to the bed gradually.

Patience and encouragement
No matter which path you choose – be patient. Big steps toward growth often happen in spurts, and your child may be excited to welcome the change one day, but wary of it the next. Maintain your nightly bedtime routine and help your child develop a positive association with his new bed, since he’ll be sleeping there for many years to come.

Copyright Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)

About the author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.

Entertaining your children’s friends is never an easy task and coming up with an idea for a birthday party is often harder. Recently, Fresh Baby creator Cheryl Tallman’s son Spencer turned five and the event was celebrated with a cooking school extravaganza. For 2 1/2 hours Cheryl and her husband transformed their home into “The Cooking School for Brilliant Kids.” Here she shares just how she did it!

We started out doing a little research on the Internet and found a neat web site called www.kidsaprons.com. We ordered disposable chef hats and aprons, and picked up a few kidsized cooking utensils to use in the take home gift bags. We also planned the menu and developed a schedule for the party.

Before the children arrived, we covered a ping pong table with white paper, did some prep on the foods, and decorated the dining room table for the birthday luncheon with balloons and the Star Wars tablecloth and plates that Spencer picked out.

When each kid arrived, they were fitted with their chef hat and apron, and we took a digital photo. We printed out their names (i.e “Chef Spencer”) on plain paper, cut it out, and used clear packaging tape to stick their name on their apron and hat. While we were waiting for all the guests to arrive, the children were given stickers to decorate their chef hats. This gave them something to do and also gave them some time to get comfortable.

The party menu included French bread pizza, pigs in a blanket, carrots sticks and green beans, and for dessert, ice cream and cupcakes. Our school started with a “group” experience of making ice cream. Each child took a turn pouring, measuring, or whisking, while the others watched attentively. We poured our ice cream in the machine and moved on to making lunch.

We spread the kids out around the table and started with the French bread pizza, each child took a piece of bread and “painted” it with pizza sauce, sprinkled cheese, added pepperoni, and placed their creation on a cookie sheet. The pigs in a blanket were next. Each child took a piece of crescent roll dough that were already separated onto a piece of wax paper. They picked up a hot dog with tongs and then rolled the dough around the hot dog, and they were placed on another sheet pan.

After the main course was prepared, we took a class photo, and it was time for a break while the master chef (me!) put everything in the oven. The kids all went into the living room for a game of “Pin The Mustache On The Chef”, and a magic show put on by my husband Roger, who picked up some magic books at the library the week before. By the time entertainment was done, the kid’s masterpieces were ready to be served. In the dining room each child’s plate had a piece of pizza, a pig in the blanket, some carrot sticks and green beans. The kids were so excited about their accomplishments. They all happily and proudly ate their lunch.

After lunch, it was back to cooking school for cupcake decorating. We had colored icing bags (tied at the top) and an assortment of sprinkles. This was the BEST event of all, the kids had great time. The creativity of a five year old is absolutely precious. After about 20 minutes, it was back to the dining room, were we sang “Happy Birthday”, and gobbled up our cupcakes and homemade ice cream. After that, we opened gifts and gave out the take home gift bags. Two and half hours seemed to fly by.

Spencer’s thank you notes were sent with a certificate (printed on our home computer) from “The Cooking School for Brilliant Kids”, and it included the child’s picture and the class photo.

If you are thinking of having your own cooking extravaganza, here are few tips that you might find useful:

When To Start Planning Baby’s First Birthday Party

Many moms wait until the last minute to start planning for Baby’s First Birthday Party.  Unfortunately people’s social calendar’s fill up, and last minute S&H add up quick.   This is why organized moms start weeks, or even months, in advance!  We suggest you start thinking about your baby’s first birthday party when your baby is about 44 weeks old.  By 48 weeks, you should have most of the details ironed out so you aren’t scrambling in the 11th hour.  Keep reading, we’ll tell you what you should be thinking about.

Party Time

What time is the best time to invite everyone over for your baby’s party? You want to make sure your baby is not going to be cranky, so you should pick a time when your baby will be well rested and not hungry. If your baby is on a schedule and you know when he should be napping, try to schedule the party between naps. Don’t make the party last too long. Your baby has a short attention span and after too much festivity is likely to begin getting fussy.

Invitation List

Invitation lists vary from house to house. If your main focus is your baby’s birthday don’t invite so many people that he gets easily overwhelmed. Just a couple of family members would be enough to celebrate the big day. If you want to use your baby’s birthday as a time to have a family get together try having an outdoor barbeque so that your baby doesn’t feel closed in, or inviting a few family members early to celebrate the birthday and have the rest come at the end of the party.

Decorations

Everybody loves balloons, especially babies! There is nothing silly about decorating for your baby’s first birthday party, but remember if you make it too “busy” your maybe may get stressed or overwhelmed by it and not be able to relax and enjoy his day. Try keeping the decorations low key, and in bright colors that will catch your baby’s eye. Stick to one birthday party theme and have fun with it!

Cakes

Yes, we said “cakes”.  Plural.  The best part of a first birthday is watching your baby put cake all over his face. No one really wants to eat a cake though that has been in a baby’s face! Many stores will make mini cakes, just for your baby, or you can make a little cake to decorate just for your baby’s birthday. This way your baby has his own cake that he can enjoy making a mess out of, while you and your family have a cake you can enjoy eating.

Pictures

Be sure to take lots of pictures and video! This occasion commences the end of your baby’s first year of life and will only happen once. You will definitely want pictures of every moment to look back on and to share with friends and family members that were not able to make it.  Be sure you designate a photographer, though, so you’re able to enjoy the experience without a camera lens between you and the action.

See Taking Pictures of Your Baby for tips on how to take photos like a pro!

Presents

Let your baby open his presents at his own pace, which means, this process may take hours!  For this reason, you may want to wait to open baby’s presents until your guests leave.  Most people will understand if you choose to wait till it is quieter and less active in the house to have your baby sit down and try his hand at unwrapping packages. It might be that your baby needs a nap before he is able to tackle the task of tearing off wrapping paper.

Be sure to keep a list (as you’re opening presents) of what everyone gives your baby for your thank you notes.

Thank You Notes

It is always good manners to send thank you notes for the gifts your baby receives from his first birthday party. Use the list you made as your baby opened his presents so you don’t forget anyone. You can even enclose a picture of your baby with that gift, or other pictures from your baby’s first birthday party. This is a good way to send out baby’s one year pictures to family members, without having to use an extra stamp.

Birthday Party Supply Stores

You can make preparing for Baby’s First Birthday super easy with one-stop shopping at birthday supply stores like Birthday Express and Birthday In A Box.  The concept is brilliant – invitations, party hats, plates, napkins, decorations, thank you cards – everything you can think of … all themed and relevant to today’s fads, in one convenient package.

Do You Have a Suggestion?

Share your tips and advice for how to have a successful first birthday party with other Babies Online moms in the comments below!

Age 1: Invite only family members and close friends only because this birthday is more for the parents than for the child. At age 1, a child doesn’t understand the concept of “Birthday Party.” He or she is getting a lot of attention—which is all a 1-year-old wants or understands anyway. You should not go overboard on presents because too much could scare or confuse a child. You should consider getting specialty items such as a plate that says “First Birthday,” a 1-year-old candle, and possible a table cover that everyone could sign with fabric paint to have as keepsakes that can someday be shown (or given to) to your grown child.

Age 2: 2-years-olds should have one or two playmates over for a small Birthday Play Day. Again I suggest you keep a birthday plate and other keepsakes for your 2-year-old.

Age 3: 3-year-olds should have three to four playmates over, and at this age you might have try a birthday game such as “Who can stack the blocks the highest?” I do not recommend having a clown or playing any games that require a blindfold over a child’s eyes such key due to the fact either can scare children at this age. Remember your child has just turned 3, and the playmates are around that age. They are still not able to understand fully structured games very well. They only know if they do something good or better than other children, everyone will give them attention. Again I suggest you collect keepsakes.

Age 4: At 4, children should now be ready for a “real” party. I suggest four or five playmates. 4-year-olds are ready now for party decorations, but I suggest you do less and save your money for the big number “5” birthday (or buy decorations that you can put away and use again). Games such as Musical Chairs, and carrying a hard boiled egg on a spoon to the finish line without dropping it relay race can be appropriate, but remember that games will be played and finished much sooner than you think. Consider having a few of your child’s favorite videos on hand. Even if the kids have seen them 100 times, they will enjoy them. After an hour or so, you will probably need a break and the children might be cranky. A movie they are all spellbound by will be a great way to relax the kids and you. You might want to consider spreading a couple of blankets on the floor and have some pillows handy for sleepyheads!

Age 5: 5-year-olds should have a big party, but remind them that this is because they are the big “5,” and either starting school or just in school, and having a “big” party will not happen every year. Explain to them that big parties are only for special birthdays such as 5 because they have started or are starting school, 10 because that is the first double-digit number, and of course 16 (“Sweet 16” for girls and “Driving Age” for boys). This will save you money in the long run. On the fifth birthday, I suggest you first decide if you want to do it yourself, rent a building or park area but still do it yourself, or call local businesses (like McDonalds) to see what party-planning packages they offer. I personally suggest renting a park area if weather permits because the kids will be just as happy playing on park equipment as they would if you spent a ton of money on a professionally planned party. Have several inexpensive disposable cameras on hand and let your Birthday Boy or Girl take pictures of his or her first “big” party!

Great games for 5-year-olds whether inside or outside are:

Choosing A Theme
How do you go about choosing a theme for your baby’s birthday? Even a one year old probably has something he enjoys whether that is a toy, a TV show, balloons or some other inanimate object. Pick one of your baby’s favorite things and create a birthday around that theme. Your baby probably won’t understand it at the time, but it is a great way to look back in 18 years and see what your baby was “into” at that particular age. Themes vary widely, but some might include:

• Sesame Street
• Elmo
• Balloons
• Clowns
• Animals (dogs, cats, etc.)
• Barbie
• Disney
• Princess
• Trucks
• Cars
• Movie theme

Decorating
Picking one theme and using it for decorating makes decorating very easy. You can normally find all your party decorations together making it simple to buy plates, napkins and cups of the same theme at the same time. Whether or not your theme is “balloons”, your baby probably loves them and sometimes you can find balloons that can be blown up in your theme as part of your decorations. You may be able to find inexpensive pictures or posters in your theme to hang on walls, or buy them at a party store. You can hang streamers from your ceiling in colors that coordinate with your theme, and if it is age appropriate for your child, a piñata would be fun!

Don’t Over Do It
While a birthday party is fun, and picking a theme is a great idea, you want to make sure you do not over do it and overwhelm your baby. While one years olds can easily be over stimulated, three year olds can often be as well. Too much excitement, cake, candy and punch for a three year old can bring on a total meltdown making it hard for you to get your baby to calm down and rest. Watch for cues from your child to when they have had enough. If you are putting up decorations and it seems to be too much, pull some down. You can stick to a theme with a few decorations and still make it a great party!

Time of Day
What time of day are you having your party? If you are having a mid-morning party then food wise you won’t need much. Even for the guests coming, you could probably get buy with some danishes or croissants since it is between breakfast and lunch. If it is at lunch time you can have a deli tray, mini quiches or little finger sandwiches for everyone to eat. A vegetable tray is a nice addition to a lunchtime party as well. For a mid-afternoon party, try serving finger food snacks such as chicken wings and little taquitos. For a dinner party consider having a pot of chili or stew, or if the weather permits a barbeque outside with hamburgers and hotdogs. If there will be other toddlers at your party, consider having an assortment of your baby’s favorite foods handy for them too munch on if their parents are willing.

Who is Coming?
What is the main age range of the people coming to the party? You want to make sure you have food and beverages that are age appropriate for all your guests. If it is all toddlers you will want a menu of kid friendly food. If it is mostly adults it is ok to get a little more unique and experimental. Make sure you have plenty of food for everyone because it is much better to have leftovers and everyone happy than not have enough food and people looking for a snack.

Tying in the Theme
What kind of party are you throwing? When possible, if you can tie the theme of your party in to the food you serve people will think you are genius! For example, if you are throwing Sponge Bob or The Little Mermaid birthday parties have a menu of seafood. Fish sticks, small shrimp, or clam chowder on a cold day along with coleslaw and hushpuppies would make a great under the sea variety of food. If you are doing a Dora the Explorer or Diego party, have a menu of Mexican food whether it is taquitos, tacos or enchiladas.

Seating
Don’t expect everyone to sit down and eat unless you specifically tell them in advance that you are preparing a sit down meal. Prepare food that can be easily carried around and eaten standing up as parents will want to be able to mingle with others easily. This also keeps down the chance that parents will forget to keep an eye on their child while you are taking care of the birthday child.

PLANNING

Keep it simple
At all ages, simple events tend to be successful and more fun. Complicated parties usually require extensive planning with little additional fun-value. What’s most important to the kids? Friends, goodies and gifts!

Watch your numbers
To keep things under control, the number of guests should be equal to one to one-and-a-half times your child’s age. (A four-year-old would have 4 to 6 guests, an eight-year-old can handle 8 to 12 guests.) For a sleepover party, divide that number in half. (Multiply the number of guests times three to determine the number of vacation days you’ll need to recover from the event!)

Involve the guest of honor
Involve your child in the planning and set up. Your child will be happier with the results and you’ll be forced to delegate some of the responsibility! Keep in mind that in case of a disagreement, YOU are the ultimate decision maker for the event.

Create a schedule of events
Things will go more smoothly if you have a planned schedule. If you know that cake-eating should be done by 2:00 you can move things along if the kids are dawdling. The schedule will keep you more calm.

YOUR KID

Plan ahead
Discuss the details of the event with your child a day or two before the party. Talk about what behavior you expect from your child. Review appropriate manners regarding arrival of guests, games and activities and opening of gifts. When you clearly describe your expectations, you can avoid the behavior problems that arise when a child is brimming with the excitement of the party environment.

Handle misbehavior wisely
Despite the best preparation, many kids become overly stimulated at their own party. You may find your usually well-behaved child jumping on your new sofa. If this happens, calmly take your child to a private corner. Acknowledge that you understand today’s excitement. Then, clearly identify two things: what you don’t want your child to do, and more importantly, what you DO want done instead.

Pick your battles
Relax your regular rules a bit. This isn’t a good time to insist that your child clean his plate before dessert.

OTHER KIDS

Know WHY they misbehave
If you understand why some of your little guests are acting “goofy” you can keep the proper perspective. First, the excitement of the event can wind kids up. Second, some kids get jealous of the guest of honor. Third, some are just acting normally, but it doesn’t match up to your idea of proper behavior.

Calmly correct bad behavior
If you see something you don’t like, take the child aside and make a specific request for change. Be polite, but clear and firm. “We don’t climb on our furniture. Please stay off the table.”

Re-direct their energy
Distract a misbehaving child by giving him a task to do, such as passing out the cake or assembling parts of a game. A busy child is less likely to be disruptive.

End on a good note
Lots of parties fall apart at the very end, when the planned activities are complete, but parents have not yet arrived. Have a quiet fill-in ready, such as coloring, bead-art, or even a video movie.

Copyright Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)

About the author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.

Great news! Your friend is pregnant! You are excited for her and want to throw her a baby shower. But where do you begin? The following timeline will help you accomplish this task with ease.

Four to Five Months Prior to the Baby’s Birth
When the expectant mother is about four to five months pregnant, you will want to let her know that you intend to throw her a baby shower.

When will the shower take place? The best time for a baby shower is either about two months before the baby is due or about 3-4 weeks after the baby is born. Ask the mother-to-be if she prefers to have the shower before or after the baby is born. Together, the hosts and guest of honor should choose a date that works well for everyone. Also, jot down as many details as you can.

Where will the shower be? If you will not be having the shower at someone’s home, now is the time to book the restaurant, hall, etc.

Who will be invited? Ask the mother-to-be to make a list of guests to invite. Give her a week or two to get the list to you and have her include addresses so you can easily mail the invitations.

What kind of shower will this be? You can choose a theme if you would like. Even if you don’t have a theme, you will want to determine whether the shower will be a brunch, luncheon, or dinner. You will also want to choose colors if you will be buying plates and napkins. If the sex of the baby is known, you may want to use blue things or pink things.

Six to Eight Weeks Prior to the Shower
This is the time to start buying everything you will need for the shower.

Invitations: The invitations are very important. They set the theme or the mood for the shower. It gives the guests their first glimpse of the special event. Be sure to include an RSVP as this makes it easier for you to plan. Also, be sure to ask the mother-to-be if she is registered for baby gifts and where. Some of the guests may ask for this information when they call to RSVP.

Paper products: If you will need paper plates, cups, napkins, plastic silverware, decorations, and tablecloths, start looking now. You don’t need to buy everything at this time, but if you keep your eyes open, you may just find a sale.

Party favors: Look for a small gift to give each guest to take home. If you are planning to play games at the shower, start collecting the items you will need and begin to purchase prizes.

One Month Prior to the Shower

One to Two Weeks Prior to the Shower

The Day of the Shower

About the Author:
Kimberly Meister is a personal stationary consultant for www.TulipPress.com and helps people choose the wording for their invitations and birth announcements. To sign up for discounts on invitations and birth announcements, send an email to support@tulippress.com.