While this special treatment was incredibly nice and thoughtful, and pregnant women all around the world probably think that more places should do this, it is not common to find places offering women special treatment just because they are pregnant. Most restaurants do not have discounts for pregnant women, neither do most stores you will find in your local town. Sometimes you can get lucky though.

One type of special treatment that many pregnant women in their third trimester would appreciate is a parking spot or spots reserved close to doors of shopping centers and grocery stores. By the time you are ready to deliver, walking a mile to buy some milk because you can’t find a close spot does not sound too exciting. Especially in the heat of the summer, or if it is cold, snowy, icy or raining outside. However, you can occasionally find these special spots at local grocery stores and chains. If you do you generally have to get a “pass” from the store that you hang in your window letting them know that you are in fact pregnant and they are only good in the third trimester and for the first couple of months after your baby is born.

It would also be nice if places like big amusement parks, where you are told you can not ride the rides, would offer discounts to pregnant women. Instead at most of them pregnant women are forced to pay the full price of $40 or $50 so that they can go in and walk around for hours while their family gets to enjoy the rides that they paid for. We are not aware of any amusement park that offers this type of discount, but if you are, please let us know so that we can tell all pregnant women to go there!

If you can not find a place in your neighborhood that offers special treatment to pregnant women, bring up the idea yourself. Mention it to the owners of your favorite restaurants, and to the manager at your local grocery store. Make them see that offering parking spots or discounts on food would help bring in the pregnant women who want to walk only 20 feet, instead of a mile, and those that don’t feel like cooking, but would rather just grab a quick bite to eat. Many times it is not done just because it isn’t thought of. After all, not everyone can be as smart as a pregnant woman.

When you find out you are pregnant and tell your children that they are going to have a new brother or sister, the reactions can be mixed. Based on your child’s age and activities, they might either be very excited or upset by this new addition. Some kids can’t wait till their baby brother or sister arrives, while others worry about what it will mean to them. Will they lose a part of you? Will you have less time and attention to give to them? Will you let them help with the baby?

If you work outside of the house, when you get home at the end of the day, especially during the first trimester, you probably find that you are exhausted and just want to lay down. Your children though, no matter what the age, will want to spend time with you, or need help with homework, and you won’t be able to relax and prop up your feet. After all, a mother’s job is never done.

If you are a stay-at-home-mom with little kids who are home with you all day, then life will get really hectic. During the first trimester when you are really tired and just want to sleep, you can’t necessarily lay down on demand, rather you have to prepare meals, run errands, play with the kids, and listen to their unending questions. “Mommy, is the baby coming today? Mommy, how much longer? Mommy, is the baby kicking? Mommy, can I feel?”

During the second trimester you might be feeling better, more energetic, and more up to having fun with your children. Then comes the third trimester and the innocent childlike comments that you may hear, that make you want to laugh and cry at the same time. My favorite was, “Mom, you used to be skinny and now you are fat. I like you better skinny but sometimes being fat is ok because it means you have a baby in your belly.” Uh, thanks dear…I love you too!

Involving your children in the doctor’s appointments can help make the trips with little ones easier to handle. Ask your doctor or midwife if your child can help find the heartbeat or help measure your belly. Look into sibling classes at your hospital, that you can take your children too. They will get a chance to see other baby’s, and see where you will be when you have the new addition. Take them to your ultrasounds so that they can see their new brother or sister moving around inside your belly.

If you are a stay-at-home-mom to school age children you should consider yourself lucky! You get 7-8 hours during the day to yourself. You get to relax, run errands without tag-a-longs which makes everything more exhausting, and take a nap when you feel you need it. Older kids tend to understand a little more about mommy being tired, and will at least attempt to help you out around the house…if you are lucky.

Being pregnant with children already is a totally new experience that is rewarding and stressful at the same time. No matter what trimester you are in or what stage of pregnancy, being pregnant after having a child will be totally different than the first time you were pregnant.

For many women, an easy way to be sure you’re getting enough folic acid is to take a vitamin with folic acid in it. The U.S. Public Health Service recommends that all women who could possibly become pregnant get 400 micrograms (or 0.4 milligrams) of folic acid every day. This could prevent up to 70% of some types of serious birth defects. But to do this, women need folic acid before they get pregnant. That’s why you should always get enough folic acid every day even if you’re not thinking about a baby any time soon. Folic acid has been added to some foods, such as enriched breads, pastas, rice, and cereals. A few cereals have 100 percent of the folic acid you need.

No one expects an unplanned pregnancy. But they happen – every day. In fact, about half of all pregnancies are not planned. That’s why you should get enough folic acid every day if there’s any chance you could get pregnant. Because by the time you know you’re pregnant, your baby’s brain and spine are already formed.

Folic Acid Now. So your body’s ready when you are.

Brought to you by the U.S. Center of Disease Control. Date last reviewed: 09/25/2003

___ Family history for both mother and father
___ Blood types of both mother and father
___ Rubella, 5th’s Disease and Chicken Pox immunity
___ Prenatal vitamins
___ Prescription medicines
___ Weight control
___ Foreign substances (smoking, alcohol, drugs)

Family History
During your first prenatal appointment your doctor or her nurse will probably just draw blood and ask a bunch of questions regarding your health and the history of health problems in both yours and the father’s family. Questions regarding birth defects, cancer, Downs Syndrome, and other general health questions. If you know these answers ahead of time it will make that first visit go much faster.

Blood Types
The blood type is very important for both you and the baby’s father when you decide to get pregnant. There are rare occasions where the mother and father’s blood type will not be compatible. In this case the baby’s blood type may not be compatible with the mothers. This can cause rejection of the fetus by the mother’s body, or lead to serious problems after the baby is born. Knowing the blood types before getting pregnant can easily solve any problems before they occur.

Immunities
Diseases such as Rubella, Chicken Pox and 5th’s Disease can be very dangerous to a pregnant women and her baby. There are blood tests that can be done before a woman gets pregnant that tests her immunity to these diseases. If a woman finds that she is not immune to one or more of these diseases she might be able to take the vaccines prior to getting pregnant to assure that she doesn’t get the disease while pregnant.

Prenatal Vitamins
Prenatal vitamins are very important for a woman once she gets pregnant. They help provide enough folic acid and iron as well as other essential nutrients that the woman will need to help sustain a healthy pregnancy. However, if you are thinking of getting pregnant, it is never too soon to begin taking the vitamins as an attempt to help maximize your health.

Prescription Medications
Be sure to review any prescription medications that you are currently taking with your doctor before trying to get pregnant. There are several medications that are not safe for you to take while pregnant and could cause harm to the fetus. In most cases there are alternate medications that you can take that are safe during pregnancy.

Weight Control
Before you get pregnant it is a good idea to be at the best weight you can be. A woman who is in the right span of weight for her height will have an easier time getting pregnant and staying pregnant. Women who are over or under weight may have a harder time getting pregnant as their body is not working to its’ full capacity.

Smoking, Alcohol, and Drugs
If you use any foreign substances you should stop. Smoking while pregnant can lead to fetal death, underweight babies and cause later health problems such as asthma in your child. Alcohol can lead to fetal alcohol syndrome which can damage parts of the brain. The same is true for recreational drug use. If you are addicted to a drug then your baby can also be born addicted to that drug causing him more long term problems in the future.

“Will my man make a good father of healthy children and will I be as good a mother as my mom?”
“Will I have a healthy baby — ten toes, ten fingers and a working heart and head?”
“When is the best time to try to make a baby?”
“Will my baby and I be healthier if I see a doctor as soon as I get pregnant?”Surprise:
These questions have environment-related answers. Yes, even, to a degree, whether your “hot” man will make a good father – or, really, a father at all. We’ve looked at such questions at the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences. Here at NIEHS, we believe we’ve learned a lot that can help you with your questions about getting pregnant and the health of your baby-to-be

Question
“I’d like to have a baby. Should I aim for a particular time of the month for intercourse — a particular few days in my menstrual cycle?”

Answer:
It seems funny — or sad — that one couple makes a baby the very first time they have sex (whether they want a baby or not) while another couple can try and try for months without getting the child they want so badly.

People trying to have a baby have often been advised to aim for the woman’s fertile time midway between her periods. They are told to have intercourse on the day the woman ovulates, or a couple of days before or afterward. Our Institute scientists, taking precise data on more than 200 healthy women trying to have a baby, have determined that you’re actually most likely to get pregnant if you have sex the day you ovulate or the five days before.

It seems that a man’s sperm may be longer-lasting than some people previously believed, while a woman’s ovum, or human egg, disappears more quickly.

Three days after intercourse, there might still be active sperm swimming around that can impregnate and fertilize a newly released egg. But if the sperm is not introduced until after the day of ovulation, a two- or three-day-old egg would be unlikely to still be in good enough shape to be fertilized, even by the freshest of sperm.

You will have a problem, however, knowing when you’re five days away from ovulation. There is no test to pinpoint that. A further problem: Your ovulation and fertile “window” – the time when you’re likely to get pregnant – can wander around. It’s like a moving target.

Older guidelines for getting pregnant assumed that the average woman is fertile between days 10 and 17 of her menstrual cycle. But that’s a very rough approximation — an “average” that may not mean much for you as an individual woman.

Seventeen percent of the women were fertile by day seven of their cycle. Two percent of women were fertile by day four!

Our study also showed very late ovulations occur, even in women who said their cycles were usually regular. Because of these late ovulations, 4 to 6 percent of the women were potentially fertile more than 28 days after the start of their cycle.

In fact, even women who regarded their cycles as “regular” had a 1 to 6 percent probability of being fertile on the day their next period was expected.

Question:
If ovulation times vary widely – and you can’t accurately predict them five days ahead of time — what should a healthy young woman do? How, in other words, should you go about trying to get pregnant?

Answer:
Well, the director of our NIEHS study, Allen Wilcox, M.D., Ph.D., suggests many couples are best off forgetting about getting the timing “right.”

Dr. Wilcox says, “If the average healthy couple wants to get pregnant, they are just as well off to relax and forget “fertile windows” and simply engage in unprotected intercourse at least two or three times over the course of each week.”

That’s easy-to-follow advice. And you’re likely to hit “right” two or more times within the fertile days occurring in each of your cycles.

If you don’t conceive the baby you want in a year or so of regular intercourse, talk to your doctor. You may be the one couple in six that has a fertility problem. Simple tests can often pinpoint and help overcome it. The problem can reside in your man about as often as in you, so he will need to be tested too.

At some point, you may be referred to a fertility clinic or specialist. You may be prescribed a drug to trigger ovulation, and your mate’s best sperm will be introduced by the doctor at that time. There are other technologies, too – some of them very expensive. There is also some risk of triggering two or more eggs and having a bigger family than you expected.

Question:
“Will my baby and I be healthier if I see a doctor as soon as I get pregnant?”

Answer:
Certainly, your doctor can increase your chances for a healthy outcome if you see him or her as soon as you’re pregnant. But to get the very best odds for yourself and your baby, you should try to see your doctor well before you get pregnant.

Your doctor will have diet and life-style suggestions that should make for a healthier baby, and a healthier you as well. You shouldn’t wait until you know you’re pregnant to eat well and take vitamins. You should check out what drugs you need to stop to prevent harm to your baby – before you even know you’re pregnant. Also, as mentioned, seeing that you are having trouble getting pregnant, your doctor can help with tests and suggestions that fit your situation.

Even with the best of care, there are hazards ahead.

In an NIEHS study of healthy women who wanted a baby, about one in five fertilized eggs failed to survive six weeks. That would be before you and/or your doctor even would know you are pregnant. It may be Nature’s way of sparing a mother the burden of carrying an embryo that cannot survive. Further along in pregnancy, a much smaller number of additional fetuses are lost in spontaneous miscarriages. That’s always sad, but 95 percent of the women losing a fetus in the study got pregnant within two years afterward.

Most women’s miscarriages, like most birth defects, have no clear cause. But genetic defects have been seen in some lost fetuses. Surely, the environment also plays a role, just as it does in the birth of preemies – early, underweight infants. (The newborns of smokers, for example, are more likely to be born prematurely than the newborns of non-smokers.)

Question:
“How do the things I eat and do affect my child?”

Answer:
What you eat, drink and do during pregnancy and just before pregnancy is vital to your child because, for nine months, your body is your child’s environment. Your circulatory system feeds nutrients to your unborn child’s system through an organ, called the placenta. Your circulatory system also removes waste materials from your child via this organ, which is attached to the wall of your uterus and to the bellybutton of your baby.

We used to think that the placenta kept poisons from reaching the unborn child. That popular idea was dealt a death blow in the late 1950′s and early 1960′s, when many women took a sedative called thalidomide which caused hundreds of children to be born with flipper-like limbs where their arms and legs should be.

Then in 1971, after it was prescribed for more than 20 years to try to prevent miscarriages, diethylstilbestrol, or DES, was found to have produced rare cancers and reproductive abnormalities in “DES daughters,” the daughters born to the women being treated. (At NIEHS, we did some of the research that showed DES’ adverse effects. Later, in test animals, NIEHS scientist Retha R. Newbold also found that harm may extend to “DES granddaughters” and to “DES grandsons.”)

Illegal or “recreational” drugs are risky, too. Cocaine’s use during pregnancy has been shown to increase malformations of the urinary tract five-fold. There are also risks of low birth weight, miscarriage, brain damage and fetal death.

Because the dangers have been publicized, many women who get pregnant know to stay away from illegal drugs, and from many nonprescription and prescription drugs as well.

If you’ve ever taken Accutane (isotretinoin) for very severe acne, you know this drug is an extremely strong cause of gross birth defects. Before taking this drug you must have a test to show you are not pregnant. Then you must take birth control measures beginning a month before you start the acne drug, throughout the treatment period and, because of its persistent effect, for a month after you stop.

Drugs to treat cancer, such as methotrexate, also cause birth defects – and pregnancy should likewise be avoided when getting such treatment.

Even aspirin carries a risk of bleeding complications for mother and child, but it may be prescribed by a doctor under certain conditions.

Thus, the best advice to pregnant women (or women who may become pregnant) is: Ask your physician before taking any prescription or non-prescription drug, including herbal medicines and other “natural” therapies.

But don’t panic unnecessarily. Some drugs have been used in pregnant women for a long time without doctors observing any problems.

If you need a drug to control high blood pressure, asthma, lupus or other chronic problems, don’t stop the moment you find you’re pregnant. Talk the situation over with your doctor first. Talking it over with your doctor before you become pregnant is even better, since the fetus may be particularly susceptible to injury at its early stages, before you even know you’re pregnant.

Epileptic? A pregnant woman’s seizures can cause damage to the unborn baby’s brain. Thus, women with epilepsy and their doctors usually decide that continuing the medication that controls the seizure is the path of less risk.

There’s a similar trade-off for women who must take insulin daily to control their diabetes. They are several times as likely to have a baby with a major defect. However, if a woman stops her insulin, neither she nor her unborn infant may survive. That’s another reason to see a doctor before conceiving a baby — yet only about one woman in four does so.

Increasingly, we are seeing that our unborn babies can also be hurt by what we eat (or don’t eat), what substances we handle at work, at home and in the farm or garden, as well as many other environmental factors. Some of these substances can subtly influence the IQ, health, development and motor skills of children still to be born – still, in some case, to be conceived.

For example, lead may be passed along. It can accumulate in the bones of a young girl exposed to it and be released, years later, exposing her unborn child. The lead can lower the child’s IQ. One study shows lead may even contribute to a child’s chances of getting into trouble with the law.

A mother’s exposure to mercury can delay her child’s development. That may also be true of PCBs, still another NIEHS study suggests. There are undoubtedly other chemicals, metals and other exposures that also produce such effects.

Harm can also result from deficiencies — from substances a pregnant woman fails to get. If you have been eating a diet without sufficient folate or folic acid, a B vitamin found in green leafy vegetables, when you become pregnant there is a greater risk of deformities called neural tube defects of the brain and nervous systems. In these defects, the infant may fail to develop a brain or, more commonly, the spinal column may fail to close around and protect the spinal cord. Without this protection, the baby’s spinal cord may be injured during the upheaval of birth so that the baby may be partially, but permanently, paralyzed.

The Food and Drug Administration now requires that rice and flour products be fortified with folate. It is difficult to get enough from an ordinary diet otherwise. Even with the fortification, government experts and others advise all women of child-bearing age – that is, girls and women from puberty through menopause – to take an ordinary, folate-containing multiple vitamin pill each day. Taking folate after pregnancy starts is not as effective.

In other ways, too, good nutrition when you make your baby may be more important than we generally think. Studies of women giving birth during World War II showed that women who conceived when near starvation were more likely to have babies with malformations than women at near-starvation when they delivered.

The idea that a pregnant woman is eating for two is true. In some cases, Nature may favor the child. The mother’s bones and general health suffer. In other situations, the baby or both mother and child are affected. Talk to your doctor or nurse-midwife about a good pregnancy diet. “Eating for two” does not mean eating twice as much but getting the appropriate amount of nutrition for both you and your unborn child.

Question:
“Will my man make a good father of healthy children – and will I be as good a mother as my Mom was?”

Answer:
You can both be fine parents of fine children — especially if you make sure your environment is free of harmful exposures.

Remarkably, each tiny, one-celled egg or ovum that you produce every month or so has actually been within your body since you yourself were born! As a result, some scientists speculate that environmental influences might impact on those ova at any time over the years they are being carried — in other words, at any time over your lifetime.

Though sperm are produced “fresh,” fathers-to-be aren’t off the hook either. Whereas women used to be more likely to be blamed, the causes of childlessness are now broken down more evenly – about 50/50.

Environmental influences, such as vitamin status, radiation, drugs, diseases, and occupational exposures, can influence the quantity and quality of a man’s sperm. Such exposures can also prevent a man from getting or maintaining an erection. So it isn’t “unmanly” for industrial, medical and agricultural workers to take advantage of lead shields, protective masks and clothing, and after-work showers. Quite the reverse.

Infections, such as mumps, are well-known causes of male infertility, but pesticides and other chemicals can present a risk of infertility and birth defects. These defects may occur if a damaged sperm fertilizes an egg and the egg does not develop properly. The result may be a miscarriage or a potential health problem in the baby later on.

Men and women may track in lead dust from building sites where old, lead-painted buildings have been knocked down, contaminating their homes and exposing their families.

Farm workers risk problems for themselves and their families if they needlessly go into recently sprayed fields and/or don’t wear long-sleeved shirts and other clothing that covers their skin. Family exposures can be minimized if workers strip off contaminated clothes at work or as soon as they return home, and the clothes are promptly washed – separately from other clothes. The exposed workers themselves should also shower promptly.

We all also have habits, good and band. You may also be interested in some NIEHS work that suggests that the old habit of female douching reduces fertility — as may too much coffee.

Alcohol can be harmful. It is regarded by the March of Dimes as the leading cause of preventable mental retardation, as well as the most common known cause of fetal damage. Major physical and mental problems occur in the children of drinking women, especially those who use alcohol a lot. Many doctors recommend you avoid all alcoholic drinks during pregnancy.

Women born with a birth defect themselves often worry that their children will be similarly affected. Working with Norwegian scientists, we studied this risk among a half-million Norwegian women (born with defects between 1967 and 1982) and their offspring. Less than 4 percent of the offspring turned out to have birth defects – and generally only at the same level of risk as other women’s children. The only significant increase in risk was for having the same defect as the mother’s. (In a follow-up study, the offspring of men who had been born with birth defects proved to have an increased risk of the same defect, compared to other men’s children, plus an increase in other birth defects as well.)

Tips

You wouldn’t expect this discussion to end without some do’s and don’ts, would you? So here (at the risk of a little repetition) are some environmental tips if you are of child-bearing age — from your teen years to menopause:

• You should not eat swordfish, shark, king mackerel or tilefish while you are pregnant or can become pregnant. These large, long-lived ocean fish accumulate mercury pollution as they eat smaller fish. If you then eat these fish, the mercury can accumulate in you and hurt the development of nervous system of your unborn child. The Food and Drug Administration also advises you not to eat these big fish when you’re nursing a baby – and not to fee these fish to small children.
• Eat plenty of green, leafy vegetables AND swallow a multi-vitamin containing folate, or folic acid, (a B vitamin) every day, before and during pregnancy.
• Avoid soft cheeses. Those delicious brie and Roquefort cheeses, particularly those famous unpasteurized products, are easily contaminated by a tough bacteria called Listeria. Ordinarily, people are not much affected by Listeria, but in pregnant women the bacteria then can cause violent vomiting, flu-like symptoms and loss of your unborn child. This loss can occur even before you know you’re pregnant.Mexican-style soft cheeses such as queso blanco, queso fresco, queso de hoja, queso de crema and asadero are susceptible, as are such other soft cheeses as feta, or goat cheese, brie, Camembert and blue-veined cheeses such as Roquefort. The Food and Drug Administration recommends that pregnant or potentially pregnant women should instead eat hard cheeses made from pasteurized milk or marked as aged for 60 days or longer.
• Take care with all foods. To reduce food poisoning risks, FDA also recommends 1) thoroughly heating meats purchased at deli counters, whether cured (like salami) or not, before you eat them; 2) washing fruits and vegetables with water, 3) keeping your refrigerator, counter top and utensils clean; 4) washing your hands and utensils with warm soapy water after contact with raw foods, especially raw meats, and 5) cooking meat, poultry and seafood thoroughly. Follow “use by” dates and other instructions for refrigerating foods.To err on the side of caution, some environmental health experts suggest that pregnant women – despite those infamous cravings we are supposed to get – avoid overdoing any single food or beverage in the diet. Varying your diet guards you against getting a massive dose of a problem substance, if there should be an accident that unexpectedly contaminates a particular food.
• Beware raw meat – and your cat. They may harbor a parasite that causes toxoplasmosis. If you get it while pregnant, your unborn child has about a 40 percent chance of contracting it too. In early pregnancy, this can cause the child to be blind, deaf and mentally retarded.The parasite can be found in cat feces, soil and infected meats that have not been thoroughly cooked. Cats get it from eating infected birds, mice and rats. So keep your family cat indoors to reduce its chances of getting the parasite – and have someone else clean its litter box, so that you don’t get it.
• Protect yourself from pesticides and other chemical exposures. We don’t know enough about the safety of home and occupational pesticides and chemicals in pregnancy. So it is a good idea to be cautious. Ask your employer to give you copies of Material Safety Data Sheets (MSDSs) for any hazardous materials in your work, as required. A few substances of concern are lead, carbaryl (Sevin), bromine vapor, carbon disulfide, ethylene dibromide, mercury vapor and styrene and acetone used in plastic production.
• Use farm and industrial materials with caution, following all the precautions on the label
  You can be exposed to chemicals in the air you breath, through your eyes, or in your food and water. So store chemicals in sealed containers when not in use, follow recommendations for ventilation. A major route of contamination is through your skin, so wear protective clothing and gloves. Wash off any spilled materials immediately. Wash your hands before eating, drinking or smoking. 

  If you are a farm worker, factory worker or scientist, or you have one as a husband, partner or family member, you and/or that other worker should shower at work at closing time or as soon as you/they get home. Clothes contaminated by pesticides, chemicals or metals should be washed at work, if possible. If they must be washed at home, they should be washed separately from other clothes, and as soon as possible.

  If you are a dentist, dental assistant or hygienist or work with the anesthetic nitrous oxide (N2O) in human or veterinary medicine, you should know be cautious because this gas has been shown to cause defects in the offspring of exposed lab animals. Adequate ventilation, tests for leaks and other guidelines should be followed to limit your exposure. Women working as potters, with solder, or as home remodelers may encounter lead, which has been associated with miscarriages, stillbirths and infertility for more than 100 years. The National Institute of Occupational Safety and Health also warns of reproductive problems among women viscose rayon workers exposed to carbon disulfide (CS2) and among electronic and semi-conductor workers exposed to ethylene glycol ethers such as 2EE and 2ME.

  And if you’re planning to decorate a room as a nursery, why not ask a pro or a partner to do the painting (while you go elsewhere and avoid the fumes.)

• Avoid smoke, as well as smoking. Smoking increases the risks of an underweight baby and of stillbirth, the birth of a dead fetus. Smoking and also passive smoke exposure may double the risk of a rare but devastating condition called persistent pulmonary hypertension of the newborn. In this condition, infants starve for oxygen because blood is not pumped through the lungs to the body but continues to flow as it did before birth and the activation of the lungs. Without successful surgery to correct the flow, the infant may die. Babies born to women who smoked during pregnancy are also more likely to have asthma and other respiratory problems. They also are more likely to die of sudden infant death syndrome – SIDS. SIDS reduction campaigns emphasize positioning infants on their backs for sleeping as well as keeping cigarette, cigar and pipe smoke away.
• Avoid x-rays, hot tubs and saunas. They pose environmental risks for pregnant women. If x-rays are needed for medical reasons, your doctor will shield your abdomen (and thereby your fetus) from the rays. The March of Dimes also suggests pregnant women try to avoid infections. Rubella (German measles) during pregnancy can cause ear, eye and heart abnormalities. You can be tested to see if you’ve been exposed and are immune. If not, you can get vaccinated – but then should wait three months before getting pregnant. For avoiding many infections, frequent hand-washing can help.
• Stay faithful to one, uninfected and equally faithful partner to prevent the tragic consequences of a new-born with HIV or other sexually transmitted diseases. Discuss your own and your mate’s sexual history (and any injected drug use) with your physician – and get tested for HIV or other infections, as appropriate. Even if you have HIV, for example, proper drug treatment can often prevent your child from becoming infected.
• Exercise moderately. Walk, swim, ride a stationary bike and/or join in a special prenatal aerobics class three or more times a week. Even a vigorous workout is ok for most women and may help you carry your baby to full term. Not so advisable: bouncing or jerking movements, toe touches, knee bends and sit-ups. Doctors generally counsel against any vigorous exercise that has you lying on your back after the first three months of pregnancy. Injury-risking sports – skiing, rock-climbing, horseback riding – aren’t good bets. But regular, safe exercise can make labor easier and prepare you to get back in shape afterwards.
• Relax, too. You don’t need a lot of stress during pregnancy, or before pregnancy either! Summing up, you just need a good clean, healthy and uninfected man; a doctor; a good diet; a vitamin pill, and a work and home environment where you won’t be needlessly exposed to tobacco smoke, pesticides, alcohol and other potentially harmful chemicals, drugs, mercury, soft cheese, undercooked meats and kitty litter.

About this Article
Provided by the National Institite of Environmental Health Services.

While it may seem farfetched to some people, many of my clients remember what they felt and experienced while still in the womb. Comments such as these are not unusual:

“I knew even before I was born that my mother didn’t want me.”

“I could feel my mother’s fear and anxiety even before I was born.”

Parenting does not start once the child is born. Good parenting starts even before getting pregnant. It starts by caring about what you eat, how much exercise and sleep you get, and by making sure that you are taking responsibility for your feelings of anxiety and stress. Your baby will feel what you feel, so learning how to be in peace and joy before getting pregnant is part of good parenting.

I loved being pregnant. I had always wanted children so I was thrilled to be pregnant. I loved feeling the baby moving within me, awed by the very fact of creating new life. I loved feeling an elbow or a knee slide across my stomach. I loved that my body could be a receptacle for bringing through this soul, this angel from heaven. I could not think of anything more profound, more worth doing. Who was this unique little person growing in my body?

I read every book I could on parenting and thought endlessly how I wanted to be a different parent than my parents were.

The problem was that I have never thought about how much my relationship with myself and with my husband might affect this child.

My husband was angry, distant and withdrawn during my pregnancy and the first three months after giving birth to our son. He was a person who wanted control and he was not happy that I got pregnant six months before we had planned. He didn’t open his heart until our son smiled at him at three months of age.

Being young, I had no idea how to handle the loneliness I felt at not having my husband joyfully involved in the hugest event of my life. Had I known then what I know now, I would have done anything I could to get the help we needed to bring our relationship back into caring. We can’t go back, but I’m sure that my son felt the lack of joy that existed between my husband and me. I’m sure he felt the depth of my loneliness. I wish I knew then what I know now about taking responsibility for my own feelings.

Being pregnant and giving birth are enormous events in a woman’s life, especially the first child, which changes your life so dramatically. If you do not know how to take responsibility for your own feelings of anger, hurt, anxiety, depression and loneliness, things will only get worse after giving birth. A child does not solve problems for you.

It’s hard to imagine before having a child what it is like to be responsible for another life 24/7. If you have not learned how to lovingly parent yourself before giving birth, you might find yourself getting lost as parent your baby. Good parenting starts before getting pregnant, with learning how to take loving care of yourself.

If you have a desire to be a good parent, here are steps you can take before getting pregnant:

1. Physical health: make sure that you are in good physical shape by eliminating sugar and artificial sweeteners. Start to shop in health food stores and buy only organic products. Eliminating pesticides and food additives is essential for good health. Also be sure to get enough exercise and sleep.
2. Emotional health: instead of having your eyes on your partner, turn your eyes inward and begin to compassionately notice your own feelings. Start to treat your own feelings in the same way you are planning on treating your future child’s feelings – with caring and understanding. In addition, start to practice taking loving action in your own behalf – standing up for yourself, speaking your truth, taking time for yourself. Practice taking loving care of your own feelings instead of making your partner responsible for how you feel. Begin to notice what you think and do that may be causing you stress. Changing thoughts and behavior that cause your stress before getting pregnant is essential for good parenting.
3. Spiritual health: practice opening to a higher source of guidance, wisdom, strength and comfort. This can be your own highest, wisest self within you, or a Higher Power outside of you. You will find that being able to turn a source of wisdom and comfort within or without will go a long way in helping you stay loving and stress-free with yourself, your partner, and your baby. In addition, this will help you know what to do in different challenging situations with your baby.

If you are planning on having a baby, start today in becoming a good parent!

About the Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including “Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

Healthier Eating
You should try to stay away from foods that are high in fat and sugar content. Look for more healthy choices and eating more vegetables and items that will not only help you be healthy but will give your baby a better shot at being healthy. Try to buy foods that are organic and pesticide free, as well as hormone free dairy products.

You should try to stay away from uncooked fish, meat and poultry, as well as cooked fish such as swordfish, shark, and king mackerel which may contain large mercury counts which would not be good for your baby if you were to get pregnant. A woman should also stay away from raw eggs, including batters and dough made with them, as well as unpasteurized milk and certain soft cheeses. You should always make sure you clean and cook raw fruits and vegetables thoroughly before eating them.

Folic Acid
Folic acid is a big ingredient to getting pregnant, staying pregnant and having a healthy baby. Before trying to conceive a woman should make sure that she is getting enough folic acid a day either from prenatal vitamins or from foods including leafy green vegetables, fortified cereals, breads and orange juice.

Beverages
You should cut back on all beverages including coffee and soda, while trying to drink more water daily. It is recommended that a person drink a minimum of 8 glasses of water a day, while some say that a person should drink half of their body weight in ounces of water a day is a good rule of thumb.

Caffeinated beverages will only help to dehydrate you. Studies have shown that a large intake of caffeine can lead to it taking longer to conceive (International Food Information Council Foundation). However when these studies looked at smoking and alcohol use while drinking caffeinated beverages the results were inconclusive. It is best for a woman to just steer clear from caffeinated beverages before and during pregnancy.

The most vital time of a baby’s development often occurs before a woman even knows she is pregnant, between 3 and 8 weeks. Because of this and the damage that alcohol can do to a fetus, it is suggested that a woman should stay away from all alcohol leading up to and during the time she is trying to get pregnant, as well as while she is pregnant.

The most important thing for a woman to remember is that everything she eats or consumes while trying to conceive is in her body when she is trying to conceive and can affect her baby. While many of us will eat and do things that we know are not good for us, would we willing give our child something that we know is not good for them? The best time to start developing healthy habits for your child is before you conceive that child.

Did you know?

As rumor has it, this chart was found buried in a royal tomb around the year 1000, and is on display at the Beijing Institute of Science in China. No one claims for it to be completely true and accurate so don’t base your attempts at trying to conceive on it, or decorate your nursery by the chart before the doctor tells you the sex of your baby.

It is fun, but how accurate is it really? Some people swear it has been correct for all their children. It was correct for my third son, but wrong on both of my first two children. It is a lot of fun guessing however at the sex of the baby and taking bets with family and friends on if the Chinese Conception Chart is accurate or not.

Month of Conception

Age Of Mother At Conception

Jan

Feb

Mar

Apr

May

Jun

Jul

Aug

Sep

Oct

Nov

Dec

18

F

M

F

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

19

M

F

M

F

F

M

M

F

M

M

F

F

20

F

M

F

M

M

M

M

M

M

F

M

M

21

M

F

F

F

F

F

F

F

F

F

F

F

22

F

M

M

F

M

F

F

M

F

F

F

F

23

M

M

M

F

M

M

F

F

F

M

M

F

24

M

F

F

M

M

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

25

F

M

F

M

F

M

F

M

F

M

M

M

26

M

M

M

M

M

F

M

F

F

M

F

F

27

F

F

M

M

F

M

F

F

M

F

M

M

28

M

M

M

F

F

M

F

M

F

F

M

F

29

F

M

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

F

F

30

M

M

F

M

F

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

31

M

M

M

M

F

F

M

F

M

F

F

F

32

M

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

M

F

M

33

F

M

M

F

F

M

F

M

F

M

M

F

34

M

M

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

F

F

35

M

F

M

F

M

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

36

M

F

M

M

M

F

M

M

F

F

F

F

37

F

F

M

F

F

F

M

F

F

M

M

M

38

M

M

F

F

M

F

F

M

F

F

M

F

39

F

F

M

F

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

40

M

M

M

F

M

F

M

F

M

F

F

M

41

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

F

M

F

M

F

42

M

F

F

M

M

M

M

M

F

M

F

M

43

F

M

F

F

M

M

M

F

F

F

M

M

44

M

F

F

F

M

F

M

M

F

M

F

M

45

F

M

F

M

F

F

M

F

M

F

M

F

]]> http://www.babiesonline.com/articles/ttc/chineseconceptionchart.asp/feed 12 http://www.babiesonline.com/articles/ttc/canyouchoosesex.asp http://www.babiesonline.com/articles/ttc/canyouchoosesex.asp#comments Thu, 28 Feb 2008 15:11:49 +0000 admin http://208.79.203.56/articles/ttc/canyouchoosesex.asp Is it possible to plan having a baby in a way as to choose whether you will have a boy or a girl? Many experts say yes! There are some theories that make sense others which have been medically proven. Still some people believe it, others don’t.

Choosing the Sex of Your Baby
A popular book written by Landrum B. Shettles, and David M. Rorvik How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby goes over the basics of this popular idea. The ideas revolve around when you have intercourse, how you have intercourse, what the man drinks before having intercourse, the speed of sperm and more.

It is generally believed in the medical reproductive community that once an egg is released and enters the fallopian tube that it is able to be fertilized for approximately 24 hours. Research has shown that sperm also has a “shelf life”, however it is different for the male and female sperm. Female sperm swims slower but is stronger and lives longer, while male sperm is faster but weaker and will die earlier than female sperm.

Per Dr. Shettles theory, if the results of research is true and the female sperm lives longer but is slower moving than the male, then if a couple wants a girl they should have intercourse at 3-5 days prior to ovulation, but then stop till after the woman ovulates. This will increase the chance of ONLY female sperm being alive when the sperm comes in contact with the egg. On the other hand, if a couple wants to have a boy they should refrain from having intercourse until 2 days prior to ovulation and then have intercourse daily until ovulation has occurred. It has also been suggested that a man drink a big cup of caffeinated coffee or a big caffeinated soft drink before intercourse to help give the boy sperm an extra little push.

The position is also important as it is believed that deeper penetration will help the sperm reach the egg faster. It is suggested that if you are trying for a girl to have intercourse in the missionary (man on top) position and if you are trying for a boy to have intercourse doggie-style which will get the sperm there quicker. In relation, during an orgasm a woman’s body releases a substance that makes the environment more alkaline which favors boy sperm, so if you are trying for a girl the woman should refrain from orgasm’s during intercourse.

Sperm count also affects a woman’s conception of a boy or a girl. If a man has a low sperm count it doesn’t help the case for either the boy or girl, but if they have a high sperm count the chances lean more towards a boy than girl. There are some suggestions that you can do to help lower the sperm count a little helping out the girl sperm a little bit. If you want a girl have sex daily from the time your period ends until 4-5 days before ovulation. Another suggestion is for the man to sit in a hot bath prior to intercourse since the hot temperatures will kill off some of the weaker, male sperm leaving more female sperm.

Dr. Shettles only claims that the ideas in his book work 70-75% of the time for those trying to conceive a girl and 75-80% of the time for those trying to conceive a boy. Before you try it you should definitely buy the book to see all the tips, hints and suggestions the authors have for you.

Not everyone believes that the Shettles Method is the way to go, or at least that ALL of the ideas that Shettles has makes sense. However, most agree with the idea that the timing of ovulation and conception go hand in hand.

Some women do natural family planning where they focus on taking morning temps so that they know when they are going to ovulate, when they have already ovulated and can plan out the times that they will have intercourse. Doing this also helps a woman see a pattern in her cycle.

Other women focus on using an ovulation predictor kit where they pee on a stick and as they body starts getting closer to ovulation they will see a line that gets darker and darker. They use this stick to tell them when they are about to ovulate and when they are ovulating as to determine when to “do the deed” in hopes of having the boy or girl that they want.

There is no right or wrong way to have a baby. As a couple, if you are trying, it is important to remember to have fun and not make intercourse a “job” as you try to get pregnant. As long as you can be happy with whatever sex of baby you conceive, then it will be easy to enjoy the entire process.

Some couples discuss all the details prior to getting married. Details that include where they will live, whose family they will spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with, how many kids they will have, and WHEN they will start trying to get pregnant. However, sometimes the baby bug will bite earlier than planned and the couple will find themselves asking, “Are we ready?”

Financially
There is an old saying, “Don’t wait till you can ‘afford’ a baby because the day will never come.” This is true because no matter how much money you make, you will always find ways to spend it. However, you should definitely be smart about it and do your research.

A baby will go through an average of 2000 diapers before they are potty trained. There is also the expense of clothing, toys, bath products, baby food, bottles, formula (if you choose), nursing pads and shirts if you are breastfeeding, strollers, car seats, beds, and more essentials you will need for your baby. On top of that there is the cost of the needs for the mother while pregnant including doctors bills and clothing, and the out of pocket costs for your hospital stay.

According to an annual study by Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion a couple may spend as much as $366,000 on each child by the time that child turns 18 years old. This does not include college tuition costs that will begin after the child graduates high school.

Couple Time
Before you settle down with “the one”, many people will tell you to make sure you sow your oats first. In other words, make sure you experiment, play, party and enjoy the single life before you get married, because once you are married you can no longer live the single life. The same is true for couples when they decide to have a baby.

A whole new world opens up with you get married. You can sleep in together, take romantic vacations, spend weekends doing “adult” things, coming and going when you want on your own schedule. The only one you have to think of besides yourself is your spouse. Throwing a child into the mix creates another world to get used too.

Romantic, two-person vacations may turn into family vacations with very little time for you and your spouse. Gone are the days of staying in bed all weekend, late dinners, and parties. These will be replaced by baby sitters, early meals, and early mornings.

However the flip side of this is that you get innocent smiles, belly laughs, an extra set of little hands and feet crawling in bed with you at 6am, movie and pizza night followed by homemade chocolate chip cookies, and art projects created with love from your child’s own hands.

There are a lot of things to consider before you decide to have a baby. Your finances, your emotional well-being, and your personal happiness are some of the most important aspects you will want to consider and be at peace with before you start you TTC journey.

Taking pictures of your growing belly is a great way to keep track of your pregnancy. It will also be a great beginning to your baby’s scrapbook or photo album. Before you start however there are several things to think of.

1. Pick the perfect outfit.
If you want to showcase your growing belly and how it makes a certain shirt or skirt change shape on your body, wear that outfit for the first picture you take and for all the pictures following. Be sure to get an outfit that will still fit your belly when you are nine months along.

2. Bikini’s.
Some women will chose to wear their bikini or a bra and panties in order to take pictures of their belly. Side by side the naked belly pictures will show every inch, as well as every stretch mark you might get.

3. Decide how much you want to remember.
Because belly pics will show every aspect of your belly, decide how much you want to remember ahead of time. Do you want to see all the stretch marks in 10 years, or would you rather your belly be covered by clothes? Early on the blemishes won’t be there, but by the end the blemishes may be more than noticeable.

4. How much of your body do you want to show?
Remember that as your pregnancy progresses and you gain weight, most of the time you don’t only gain it in your belly. Many times you will gain it in your face, your behind, your legs and your thighs. Some people will want to see the full change, others will want to forget. Whatever you decide, go with it for your first picture and follow through with it for the rest.

5. Use props.
Maybe you go out immediately and buy the baby’s first stuffed animal or you want to detail your progress with a tape measure. Knowing that some of your baby’s first pictures will be with that stuffed animal, you can take pictures of yourself holding the animal, or as your belly gets bigger you can have the animal “holding” the belly. You can also get a picture of the tape measure around your belly so that you can record the inches you grow not only on paper but on film.

Use your imagination when it comes to photographing your pregnancy and your belly growth! The sky is the limit and nothing is out of line. After all, you will only be pregnant THIS time once, and all pregnancies are different so you will never be able to get these exact shots again. And with all the FREE print offers these days that include free shipping and free online storage, be sure to take as many shots as you can.