Amniocentesis is normally performed when a woman is between 15 weeks and 18 weeks pregnant. To perform amniocentesis your doctor or midwife will hook you up to an ultrasound machine and then insert a needle through your belly into the uterus and remove approximately 2 tablespoons of fluid to test and analyze. An amniocentesis can also be performed when you are 37 weeks or later in order to check your baby’s lungs and determine if they are mature enough for the baby could breathe on his own outside of the womb.

Amniocentesis is normally performed on women who are at high risk for a various number of reasons. These reasons might include

• Advanced maternal age (35 or older)
• Diabetes
• Previous children with medical problems at birth
• Abnormal triple screen results
• RH factor

Not only can amniocentesis determine if your baby is healthy or has any medical problems, but it can also unmistakeably determine the gender of your baby. For couples who want to know, ahead of the birth if they are having a boy or girl, is a pleasant and exciting plus to the amnio.

Amniocentesis is not done as a routine procedure during pregnancy because it does carry some risks. About 1 in 200 pregnancies will end in a miscarriage caused by the amniocentesis procedure. Therefore, an amnio is only performed when previous tests or ultrasounds suggest that there is a possibility of a severe medical problem. Even when this possibility exists, some women exercise their option of not having the test, and wait till their baby is born to deal with any problems he may or may not have. If you are not sure which choice is best for you, talk to your doctor or midwife.

I think we all know one family that fits this description. It puts you into a very uncomfortable position. You know you can’t discipline the kids, but you want to be able to enjoy your time with their family. What to do? Here are a few ideas that may help:

Spend more time on your turf
When possible, meet at your home. Let all the kids know exactly what your expectations are. In other words, My house, my rules. Be kind and friendly, but firm, “Hugo, in this house we don’t jump on the sofa.” Often the kids who misbehave at home will behave correctly when given rules to follow at your house.

Stick to the current problem
Don’t try to raise other people’s kids. Focus on the specific issue at hand. Find a solution to the problem only to the extent necessary to make things run smoothly where your children or your property is involved.

Don’t stew and mumble
It’s easy to gripe and complain about a kid’s behavior. It doesn’t solve anything. Instead, avoid accusing or blaming. Simply state the problem and suggest solutions. Once you have a plan, calmly follow through.

Let them handle it
Memorize this line, “They’re not my kids.” Allow the parents to deal with the misbehavior (or not deal with it, as the case may be). Step in only to protect your kids or your property.

Visit without the kids
Do you enjoy the parents, but dread time spent with their kids? Arrange for more visits to occur when the kids are in school or otherwise occupied. Or meet at adult-oriented activities where the kids will need to be left home with a babysitter.

Pick your battles
Ignore the petty stuff, focus on the important things, and be thankful your own children are well behaved

Copyright Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)

About the Author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.