Some couples discuss all the details prior to getting married. Details that include where they will live, whose family they will spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with, how many kids they will have, and WHEN they will start trying to get pregnant. However, sometimes the baby bug will bite earlier than planned and the couple will find themselves asking, “Are we ready?”

Financially
There is an old saying, “Don’t wait till you can ‘afford’ a baby because the day will never come.” This is true because no matter how much money you make, you will always find ways to spend it. However, you should definitely be smart about it and do your research.

A baby will go through an average of 2000 diapers before they are potty trained. There is also the expense of clothing, toys, bath products, baby food, bottles, formula (if you choose), nursing pads and shirts if you are breastfeeding, strollers, car seats, beds, and more essentials you will need for your baby. On top of that there is the cost of the needs for the mother while pregnant including doctors bills and clothing, and the out of pocket costs for your hospital stay.

According to an annual study by Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion a couple may spend as much as $366,000 on each child by the time that child turns 18 years old. This does not include college tuition costs that will begin after the child graduates high school.

Couple Time
Before you settle down with “the one”, many people will tell you to make sure you sow your oats first. In other words, make sure you experiment, play, party and enjoy the single life before you get married, because once you are married you can no longer live the single life. The same is true for couples when they decide to have a baby.

A whole new world opens up with you get married. You can sleep in together, take romantic vacations, spend weekends doing “adult” things, coming and going when you want on your own schedule. The only one you have to think of besides yourself is your spouse. Throwing a child into the mix creates another world to get used too.

Romantic, two-person vacations may turn into family vacations with very little time for you and your spouse. Gone are the days of staying in bed all weekend, late dinners, and parties. These will be replaced by baby sitters, early meals, and early mornings.

However the flip side of this is that you get innocent smiles, belly laughs, an extra set of little hands and feet crawling in bed with you at 6am, movie and pizza night followed by homemade chocolate chip cookies, and art projects created with love from your child’s own hands.

There are a lot of things to consider before you decide to have a baby. Your finances, your emotional well-being, and your personal happiness are some of the most important aspects you will want to consider and be at peace with before you start you TTC journey.

Potty training, toilet training, toilet teaching or toilet learning are names frequently used to describe how kids learn to use the bathroom independently.

Children who are potty training or ready to potty train will:

A study put out by the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia states that the average age for a child to start potty training is 27 months. This being the average age, there are a lot of toddlers that won’t be completely potty trained till after their third birthday.

You can try to encourage your child to potty train, but you shouldn’t push them or get mad as it could only slow the process for them. When your child starts to show interest in YOU going potty, ask them if they want to sit down and try. Many kids might be scared or might just say no. Try to put them on their own potty chair or on the toilet before and after baths, right before bed, or first thing when they wake up in the morning. Some kids will be more comfortable on their own potty chair, others will want to try it like a “big person”.

If you have a child that just doesn’t “get it”, see if you can get them to sit on the toilet or potty chair and try giving him milk, juice or water. Have him sit there till he goes, as the urge might still be involuntary. When he does go applaud and cheer, make a big deal out of it. Chances are he may not know the jist of what he did, but he will know that he pee’d in the potty and you are happy. This praise from parents can often help a child along.

Dr. Phil has his own advice and tips when it comes to teaching your child the art of potty training. Several celebrities have used his methods and believe that they worked in helping them succeed in training their child, including Holly Robinson Peete and Vanessa Marcil. His method includes getting a doll that wets letting the child see this doll going potty and getting praise, so that the child wants the praise as well.

Often times, subsequent children potty train faster than your first. Seeing an older sibling running around is often encouragement for a toddler to hurry up and get there. They want to be like their older sibling. Also, getting a child to not only pee, but poop on the toilet can be a challenge in itself, especially for boys. For some reason boys seem to find it harder than girls to get fully potty trained.

There are no concrete methods that will guarantee your 2 year old will potty train when you are ready for him too, if he is not ready. It is best to remember that you just not push him, get mad, or yell if he isn’t doing it fast enough. Don’t make it seem like a big deal so that your child doesn’t fight the effort to learn. Eventually something in your child’s head will “click” and your child will be ready to potty train. After all, how many kindergarteners do you know who start school still in diapers?

The biggest dilemma when photographing our smallest stars is that they do not yet understand that you can still be there even if they cannot see you. I chuckle often at my two year old who will hide her face when caught doing something naughty. Her logic dictates that if she can’t see me I can’t see her. Even at younger ages, babies identify with that sort of logic. It doesn’t matter if you are in the same room, if he or she cannot see you your baby will become agitated to some degree, which makes those smiles far more fleeting.

If you would like to capture those smiles while being able to stay behind the camera there are a few tips, tricks, and techniques that will help you do just that. The simplest solution is for those who have digital cameras with the preview feature that allows you to see on the screen exactly what the lens will capture. This allows you to hold the camera away from your face and lower so that your little one can respond to your smiles and you can still capture the perfect moment on you camera without ever once needing to hide your face from your little one.

If your camera does not have this nifty feature you do not need to despair. You can try using a favorite toy in order to light your baby’s face with smiles and giggles. Music is another great thing to which our babies respond. Hum along to one of his or her favorites or make up a silly song about taking pictures. You can also dance around behind the camera and turn it into a game of peek-a-boo, be careful however that you are standing still when you snap that perfect shot.

Capturing your baby’s smiles for future enjoyment may seem to be a daunting task if you do not go about it with the attitude of having fun and sharing a special moment with your precious little one. The most important thing is that you have fond memories attached to the photographs you take of your baby and his or her beautiful smiles.

Potty training is easier and happens faster if your child is truly ready in all three areas: physical, cognitive and social. But the big question is: how do you know when your child is ready? If you have never traveled this road before, you likely don’t even know what signs to look for. Take this quiz to find out where your child is on the readiness spectrum.

1. I can tell by watching that my child is wetting or filling his diaper:

a. Never.
b. Sometimes.
c. Usually.

2. My toddler’s diaper needs to be changed:

a. Frequently, every hour or two.
b. It varies.
c. Every two to three hours–sometimes less frequently.

3. My child understands the meaning of wet, dry, clean, wash, sit, and go:

a. No.
b. Some of them.
c. Yes.

4. When my child communicates her needs, she:

a. Says or signs a few basic words and I guess the rest.
b. Gets her essential points across to me.
c. Has a good vocabulary and talks to me in sentences.

5. If I give my child a simple direction, such as, “put this in the toy box,” she:

a. Doesn’t understand or doesn’t follow directions.
b. Will do it if I coach or help her.
c. Understands me and does it.

6. My child can take his pants off and put them on:

a. No.
b. With help he can.
c. Yes.

7. When I read a book to my child, he:

a. He ignores me.
b. Sometimes listens, sometimes wanders off.
c. Sits, listens and enjoys the story.

8. My toddler wants to do things “all by myself”:

a. Never.
b. Sometimes.
c. All the time!

9. I think that it’s the right time to begin potty training:

a. No.
b. I’m undecided.
c. Yes.

Total the number of responses for each letter:

a. __________

b. __________

c. __________

Most answers are a: Wait.

Your little one doesn’t seem to be ready just yet. Test again in a month or two.

Most answers are b: Time for pre-potty training–get ready!

Your child is not quite ready for active training, but you can take many steps to prepare your toddler for the future. Gradual introduction of terms and ideas will make potty training easier when the time comes.

Most answers are c: Your toddler is ready to use the potty!

It’s time to start your potty training adventure. Good luck, and have fun!

Are you between two scores?

Just like any parenting situation, there are choices to make. If your child is hovering between two categories, it’s time to put your intuition to good use. Your knowledge of your own child can direct you toward the right plan of action.

This article is an excerpt from The No-Cry Potty Training Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Child Say Good-Bye to Diapers by Elizabeth Pantley.

About the author:
Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several books, including Gentle Baby Care : No-cry, No-fuss, No-worry — Essential Tips for Raising Your Baby, The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night, Kid Cooperation (with an introduction by William Sears, MD), Perfect Parenting, as well as her latest The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers and is also president of Better Beginnings, Inc. She is a popular speaker on family issues, and her newsletter, Parent Tips, is seen in schools nationwide. She appears as a regular radio show guest, and has been quoted in Parents, Parenting, Redbook, Good Housekeeping, American Baby, Working Mother, and Woman’s Day magazines. Visit Elizabeth’s web site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth.

Checklist:
What items do you need to have prepared before you put your baby in the bath in order to make your job go smoother?

____ A sparkling clean baby bath (or sink) with soft insert (towel or sponge, also clean)
____ Running water
____ Baby soap
____ A warm room
____ Wash cloth and small face washing cloth
____ Clean baby towel
____ Clean outfit
____ Two clean diapers (just in case)
____ A baby!

Tips:

• Have everything ready before you start the bathing process.
• Make sure the room is warm – if necessary, use a space heater to help warm it up.
• In a small bowl, mix a little baby soap with warm water. Use this solution for washing so you won’t have to worry about getting too much soap on an already slippery baby.
• Want to remember these early days? Get someone else to take a picture or two of your little one in the bath.

Step-by-step:
1. Choose a clean place to bathe your baby. The kitchen sink, since it’s higher it won’t strain your back as much, is a popular place for a baby to take their first bath. You can also use a baby bath. You will want to use a foam bath mat or washcloth at the bottom of your “tub” so that your baby doesn’t slip.

2. Make sure that the room is warm and draft-free and have everything – from soap to towel – ready.

3. Don’t plan on answering the phone or the door or using the facilities. Babies can drown quickly in as little as two inches of water so stay within arms reach of your baby at all times.

4. Fill the bath a few inches deep with warm water. Some babies don’t like the water running while they are in the bath. If this is your baby turn it off before you put him in.

5. Slowly get the baby undressed. Tell your baby what is going to be happening and make it sound like fun. Babies will learn what bath time is and get excited, often kicking and squealing if they know it is something you are excited about as well.

6. Slowly put your baby in the tub, supporting her neck and body the whole way as she gets used to it.

7. Start washing her face. Use a very small amount of soap. (We cut a soft towel into little strips for washing the baby’s face.) They really don’t like having their whole face covered, so just wash one small area at a time.

8. Some people will start with the head next and work their way down, but if your baby isn’t really dirty you may want to do the body first. Heat is lost through babies head so often if you wash their hair first and then wash their body they may get chilled. Don’t forget to get behind the ears, her neck and under the arms – all places where stuff can accumulate.

9. Wash your baby’s arms and legs. It’s amazing the lint that collects in their little fingers and toes, so make sure to rinse those areas well.

10. Clean around the belly button, and finally, the diaper zone. Remember to rinse this area thoroughly so that there isn’t soap left there that will irritate your baby’s sensitive skin.

11. Once you’ve washed the front of baby, it’s time to clean the back. Cup your hand around the baby’s neck and hold your little one up so that with the other hand, you can clean her back and rear.

12. Almost done! Lean your baby back and hold on tight, they are slippery! Place a hand under each arm, lean her slowly forward and pick her up out of the bath. Gently lay her down on the towel.

13. Dry off your baby thoroughly. Some babies like hooded towels (they are cute) and it’s comforting to them and keeps their wet heads warm. (Make sure the hood doesn’t descend into their eyes). Hood or no hood, make sure that you keep your little one’s head warm while you dry her.

14. Your baby’s clean! Time for a new diaper and a clean outfit.

When To Start
Back in the 60′s parents were starting their babies on baby cereal and stage one food as early as 2-3 weeks old. Over the years the recommended age to begin babies on stage one foods has been pushed back to two months to four months, and is now set between four and six months. If your baby is exclusively breastfed most pediatricians don’t recommend starting solids until he is six months old. Your breast milk naturally provides and the nutrients and vitamins to help your baby grow. The timing is dependent upon many things that are unique to your baby, so as your baby’s pediatrician what his opinion is and why, before you decide.

How Will You Know Your Baby is Ready
As you will come to learn, the key to knowing your baby and understanding his wants and needs will be to watch his signs. There are many signs and developmental milestones that your baby should hit before he is ready to begin eating solids. Some of them include:

• Being able to hold head up and sit upright
• Absence of the extrusion reflex (the natural reflex babies have to push foreign objects out of their mouth)
• Reaching at least 15 pounds
• Starting to make chewing motions with their mouth
• Reaching for your food

This doesn’t mean that your baby can reach one of these milestones and be ready for solids, or has to reach ALL of these milestones before you can start him on solids. Some babies who are big when born may hit the 15 pound mark within the first two months, but they are probably not sitting on their own yet. Some babies who can sit can’t necessarily chew yet. Some babies will reach for your food and make chewing motions with their mouth, but may be on the petite side only weighing 10-12 pounds. Along with your pediatrician you should weigh your baby’s progress and determine when he is ready to start on solids.

How To Introduce Solids
When introducing solids you should start slowly with thinned down baby cereal mixed with either breast milk or formula. Most pediatricians suggest starting with rice cereal as there are rarely allergies related to this. Once your baby has mastered cereal, start introducing more of the stage one vegetables. It is suggested that you start with veggies because they are not sweet and will not make your baby start craving sweet foods. When you do introduce a new food, refrain from introducing more than one new food a week. This will help you determine what foods your baby likes or doesn’t like or has an allergic reaction to if a rash appears.

When introducing your baby to solids check with your pediatrician, watch for your baby’s clues and above all else remain patient. Remember this whole eating thing is much newer for your baby than it is for you and is a learning experience for both of you.