Hello my name is Sara and I am the proud Mommie of 2 beautiful boys. I enjoy my job very much. I can say that now with much confidence, but there was a time that I couldn’t. There was a time that I despised being a Mommie. I can remember that just the touch of my children sent me into a rage. This made me feel very sad and empty. Although I had these negative feelings, somewhere deep inside of me I still wanted, with all my heart to be the Mommie I was meant to be to my two little boys. I didn’t know what was going on with me. I read up on Postpartum Depression prior to the birth of my boys but what I was going through did not match up to what I had read.

I thought I would be a little flighty, weepy, and sad, but I also thought that it would go away soon after it came. Another thing I didn’t know is that Postpartum Depression can happen anytime within the first year after the birth of your child. (I didn’t experience postpartum depression with my second child until about 3months postpartum.)

Many people, like myself, think they know what postpartum depression is but, unless you have lived it, you will never know. Most women experience the “baby blues” which is crying and a little mood swings. They usually occur anywhere between 3 days to 2 weeks after she has the baby. It soon subsides and she starts to feel like herself again.

Postpartum Depression is something completely different. It is like a deep hole that you sink into and can’t get out of. It is feeling like you are unworthy to be a mom or to be alive. It is feeling like everything you say and do is wrong. It is not being able to care for your hygiene needs or the needs of your baby. It is not being able to get out of bed in the morning; the afternoon, the evening, and pretty soon, you’re just not getting out of bed. It is thinking that your children/husband/partner will be better off without you in their life. It is wishing you did not have this baby to care for. It is feeling like running away. It is angry outbursts and loving caresses. It is not wanting to hold the baby, hear the baby, or love the baby.

Sometimes it is intense fear of going outside, paranoia, or fearing someone is trying to take your child away from you. It could also be overly obsessing over the cleanliness and health of you and your child, to the point where you do not feed or care for the both of you properly.

Sometimes someone may look like a “together” Mommie, doing all the “things” she is supposed to be doing, but on the inside she is a wreck about to explode. All of these and more go on inside the head of a Mommie experiencing Postpartum Depression. More than likely, she is not aware of these feelings or does not completely understand what is going on inside of her. Is it normal? Should she tell someone? What if they think she is crazy? Or worse, What if they think she is a bad Mommie and take her baby away?

It is wise to note that PPD can happen anywhere from 3 days after the baby is born to 1 year postpartum. A mom can do well for the first 5 or 6 months postpartum and fall into a deep depression. Also, if you have had PPD with previous pregnancies, there is a chance that you will have it in subsequent pregnancies. Make sure you let your care provider know if you have had PPD in the past and they can curtail the symptoms before they cause deep depression. There are medications available today that are safe to take while breastfeeding. So don’t let that keep you from taking care of you. After all, if you take care of you, you’ll be able to care for your baby!

Although this is a dark place, with help, the time you are in the “hole” is lessened with medication and talk therapy things can and will get better. PPD affects a lot more women than most are willing to admit. It is very normal. It is a sickness and needs to be treated right away at the first signs. For a preliminary test to see if you are risk for Postpartum Depression, visit http://postpartumstress.com/ppd_risk__assessment_during.html

It is also helpful for husbands/partners to read the questions because sometimes it is they who recognize the signs first. Contact your doctor or therapist when you feel these symptoms. Sometimes all you need is talk therapy and a support group. Other times medicine may be necessary to get your hormones to balance out. For help online go to http://www.ppdsupportpage.com

Another illness likely to appear after the birth of the baby is Postpartum Psychosis. (Andrea Yates is the most recent publicized case of Postpartum Psychosis recognizable by most American.) This is a very dangerous disorder. It can occur from 3 days to about 2 weeks postpartum. Its symptoms include paranoia, delusions, and hallucinations. IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOU GET THE MOTHER TO A DOCTOR OR AN EMERGENCY ROOM. This is nothing to take lightly. She could harm herself or others, including her children.

Having said all this, I would like to add, that PPD is very treatable. The sooner it is noticed and treated the sooner the mom will feel better. You can get past it. You can see the light at the end of the “hole” and you can get out. I am an example of this.

One more thing before I close, most women, about 80%, have baby blues and they go away within 2 – 3 weeks. Some even experience a heightened time of awareness and clearness. They feel Good and Happy with Mommiehood.

Something that you may want to keep in mind when preparing for the birth of your child is a Postpartum Doula. What is a Postpartum Doula you may be asking? Well, it is someone specially trained to support, encourage, and educate the Mommie during her postpartum period. You can check out the National association of Postpartum Care Services NAPCS for recommended certified doulas.

A postpartum doula will provide the Mommie with physical support, emotional support and household support. Unlike the Baby nurse, who is there for the babies needs, a Postpartum Doula is there for the Mommie. However, Postpartum Doula’s do not diagnose medical conditions for the Mommie or the baby, but they will refer them to a healthcare provider. Postpartum Doula’s do not take over the care of the baby, but assists the Mommie, in learning to care for her and her baby’s needs. To better understand the differences between the “baby blues”, “Postpartum Depression” and Postpartum Psychosis, visit http://www.geocities.com/mommie_care/defineppd.html where you will find my Definition of Terms.

References for further Study:

Postpartum Education For Parents
Wings of Support
Center for Postpartum Adjustment
Just For Dads
Postpartum Recovery: Things to Know Before You Give Birth
Postpartum Depression and Breastfeeding
Depression After Delivery
California Postpartum Health Alliance
Mood Disorder Questionnaire
Building A Support System

Personal Stories:

Ruth Rhoden Craven (March 9, 1966 – December 5, 1999) – http://www.ppdsupport.org
Karen’s Story – http://www.bcrmh.com/womens_voices/karen.htm

Postpartum Doula’s:

DONA, Doula’s of North America:
CAPPA, Childbirth and Postpartum Professional Association

About the Author:
Sara Duggan is the proud Mommie of Noah and Jonah. She is the wife of Terrence, her best friend. She owns MommieCare, a place for Mommies to turn to when they need information or products to enable them be the BEST they can be. She is a Volunteer Doula and plans on opening a Volunteer Postpartum Doula Practice in the Near Future. For more information visit http://www.geocities.com/mommie_care/index2.html – sara@raisingason.com

Slow Down
Don’t rush your baby with his eating. Let him take little breaks and have adequate time to eat his “food”. It may mean that you need to nurse for a shorter amount of time but more often in order to give your baby a chance to digest some of his food.

Don’t Overfeed
Don’t try to force feed your baby. If he acts full stop feeding him. Overfeeding your baby can cause a back up of gas leading to painful reflux before the food is properly digested.

Consider What Your Baby Is Wearing
Tight clothing can make reflux worse, so make sure your baby’s clothing is loose. Change your baby’s diaper before feeding him and leave it a little loose so that there is room for his belly to expand. Check his diaper afterwards to make sure it isn’t too tight.

Feed In a Comfortable Position
Try feeding your baby in an upright position and when possible hold you baby upright for at least thirty minutes after feeds to help reduce reflux. If this is not possible try setting him in his swing or a seat on the floor that allows him to sit upright. This allows gravity to work at holding the food in their tummies.

Try Thickening Foods
Ask your pediatrician about thickening your baby’s formula with cereal. Depending on your baby’s weight and age, his doctor may say it is safe to start this. Always consult your pediatrician prior to starting solid foods though with your baby as you don’t want to cause any other problems.

Avoid Foods That Cause Problems
If your baby has a milk allergy then soy based or hypoallergenic will likely help the reflux improve. It may mean cutting certain foods out of your diet in order to help your baby process breast milk easier. Avoid the known allergens such as whole milk, chocolate milk, tomatoes, and citrus fruits like oranges, grapefruit and pineapple. You can also try to stay away from fatty foods.

Burp Frequently
Try to stop during your feedings to burp your baby. Getting rid of access air can help the food digest faster. Always remember to burp your baby for a last time after he is done eating.

Change Formula Brand
If you are using formula you may find that changing the brand helps. If your baby has a milk allergy or sensitivity then soy based or hypoallergenic will likely help the reflux improve. Only change formula however after talking to your doctor about the problems you are having.

Babies will normally get over reflux on their own eventually. In some cases of severe reflux damage can be done to your baby’s stomach and esophagus. If you are concerned about your baby be sure to speak to his doctor at your next well-check.

Kelli turned to the calming properties of natural lavender essential oil to make both her baby and herself tranquil again. “I use Aura Cacia’s lavender essential oil to calm my sweet baby, and to bring back my sanity,” says Weber. “It helped with the transition to my new motherhood lifestyle.”

Lavender’s relaxing properties have long been acknowledged. The use of lavender-based herbal sleep pillows, for example, goes back centuries. And now there’s growing scientific evidence supporting lavender’s soothing properties.

Medical journals have published research conducted at universities and hospitals around the world that suggest the aroma of lavender can affect our moods by altering our brain (EEG) activity. A classic study at the University of Miami School of Medicine in 1998, for example, found that subjects exposed to the aroma of lavender for just three minutes showed more positive moods, greater relaxation and increased drowsiness.

Mindy Seiffert, the mother of twin four-year-old boys and the aromatherapy manager for Aura Cacia, a leading U.S. manufacturer of aromatherapy products (www.auracacia.com), offers these tips on using lavender to enhance the experience of caring for a baby:

• Massages: Both baby and mom can benefit from a lavender massage. Ready-to-use lavender massage oils are available, or a few drops of lavender essential oil can be mixed with sweet almond oil or unscented lotion.
• Baths: A soaking bath with lavender is another way to relax. A variety of lavender bath products exist (be sure to use an all-natural product), or simply add a few drops of lavender essential oil to the bath water. For a baby’s bath, use just two or three drops; for Mom, use five to ten.
• Quick touch-up: No time for a bath today? Rub a few drops of lavender into a baby’s hair for a fresh, floral aroma, or add 2 to 3 drops of lavender to a bowl of warm water to enhance a quick sponging off.
• In baby’s room: Sprinkle a few drops onto a simple terra cotta diffuser, or use an electric diffuser to disperse the scent of lavender throughout the room during naps and bedtime. Another option is a lavender mister. And don’t just limit these to baby’s room — a lavender diffuser can help Mom relax during “down time.”
• Laundry: Add a few drops of lavender essential oil to the baby’s laundry (including the crib sheets), not only for the aromatherapy benefits, but also for the soft, clean aroma.
• In the car: Parents are usually excellent multitaskers, but trying to calm a fussy baby while negotiating traffic is never easy. To help keep calm in the car, try sprinkling a few drops of lavender onto the baby’s car seat or a handkerchief or use a special car diffuser (which plugs into the lighter) to spread the lavender aroma throughout the car.
• Diaper cream: Add a drop or two of lavender oil to diaper cream to help protect and soothe baby’s bottom after diaper changes.

Essential oils are extremely concentrated. Follow usage directions carefully and keep them tightly closed and out of the reach of children. For more information on lavender, essential oils and aromatherapy, visit the Aura Cacia Web site at www.auracacia.com.

Courtesy of ARA Content