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Ryan is our little early bird. He was born at 34 weeks gestation on Monday, May 10, 2004 at 6:54 PM at the Rockyview General Hospital. His APGAR's were 9, 9. He weighed in at 3 pounds, 13 ounces and was 16 1/2 inches long. He had blue eyes and a head full of brown hair. Because of Ryan's prematurity he spent 27 days in the Special Care Nursery.
Thanks to all the doctors and nurses at Rockyview General Hospital for their wonderful care, especially Dr. Pow, Dr. Penner, Dr. Lam, and Dr. Tierney. We will always be grateful to everyone involved in Ryan's care at the hospital and also to everyone who prayed for his continued improvement throughout his hospital stay.
''I hear babies crying, I watch them grow, they'll learn much more than I'll ever know. And I think to myself, what a wonderful world''
Ten years ago I played a band arrangement of that song. I couldn't stand it. I never understood why it is loved by so many. A few weeks ago while watching Oprah I had a change of mind. The segment was about a NICU that was getting a much needed makeover. While the cameras were focused on the little babies Louis Armstrong was singing in the background. I sat in front of the tv and cried. Could there be more appropriate lyrics? Suddenly the enormity of the whole situation hit me. The nursery Ryan was in had 20 beds. There are three hospitals in Calgary with special care nurseries totalling 60+ beds. 60 tiny babies growing. Maybe they don't all gain weight everyday, but slowly, surely, the grams increase and the babies move closer and closer toward homecoming. And this is just one city, in one province, in one country.
On June 5th it truly became a wonderful world. We were told that Ryan was being discharged the next day. I was allowed to stay overnight with him in a care-by-parent room. Over the course of 4 weeks he had overcome hypoglycemia, jaundice, suspected sepsis, and the need for supplemental oxygen. Now there was just one more hurdle - the carseat test. While he sat for 90 minutes in his gigantic infant carseat we went for a walk behind the hospital. Although I had spent 4-5 hours everday at the hospital it was the first time I had the strength to go outside. It was a beautiful evening that I felt had been created just for me. He passed the test with flying colours and was able to come off all his monitors. For the first time since his birth I was able to hold him with no wires attached. For the first time ever I was able to hold him in my arms and walk around. There is no greater joy. The next morning brought freezing rain but in my mind it couldn't have been more perfect - I was bringing my baby home.
Over a year has past since Ryan was born. I don’t think about the hospital experience as much anymore. But sometimes at nights when the wind is howling and I can’t sleep, I take Ryan to bed with me and think myself to sleep. While I listen to his rhythmic breathing I think about the inconveniences he put us through, driving to and from the hospital, eating almost nothing but fast food, sky-high cell phone bills. Of course I also think about the all waiting and worrying, crying and confusion, lonliness and uselessness. Most of all I think about how much things have changed.
In most ways it seems like he was never born premature. You would never know it by looking at him today. He has gained 15 pounds and grown more than 13 inches since his birth. For eleven months I worried like crazy. Why wasn’t he bearing weight on his legs? Rolling over? Pulling up? Crawling? Nobody could convince me he was fine. Then one day out of nowhere he just got up on all fours and crawled. Suddenly I stopped worrying about his development. I have no idea why. Perhaps I no longer see him as that tiny, helpless babe who was in the hospital, but as a smart, energetic toddler who can melt my heart with just a smile.
Just two days shy of the ever-so-important homecoming anniversary mentioned above, we attended a party at the Rockyview in honour of the past year’s Special Care Nursery graduates. Words cannot fully describe the feeling that came over me when I entered the hospital for the first time in 363 days. I was so proud of Ryan and all of the other babies in attendance that I almost started to cry. Then I looked at a scrapbook of thank you cards, pictures, etc. that one of the nurses had made and I did cry. Every baby had a story. Every parent was eternally grateful to the staff of Unit 63. And yet here we were, one year later, as if nothing had ever happened. What a wonderful closure to such an eventful year! Here’s to Ryan’s second year being one of walking, talking, laughing and growing.
Two year update - Well, we’ve got the walking (15 months), we’ve got some talking (between 75-100 words, though many are unclear) and believe it or not, we’ve even had some growing (6 lbs and 4 inches since his 1st birthday). Of course, the laughter was never in question, we hear that every hour of every day, including a new laugh that literally sounds like “Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha”.
What do we look forward to in Ryan’s third year? Continued health and happiness, love and laughter, an appetite, and the birth of a new brother or sister for Ryan.
We love you and are so proud of you Ry-Guy!
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